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Born1From1an1Egg
2 570 M Embraced 4
PathStep 9 Compassion hearts61 Forum posts36 Forum upvotes48 Current upvotes48 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2025 Member sinceSeptember 18, 2021
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What am I to say I wonder

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Everything goes wrong
Depression Support / by Born1From1an1Egg
Last post
 March 17th, 2025
...See more I haven't posted here in a long time, and kinda forgot how to properly do so, so forgive me if this is in the wrong category or whatever. This is just another vent post as I feel deeply lost and just need somewhere or anyone to listen to me, even if its just reading this. I'm going to see a therapist for the first time soon, but I don't know how well that'll help me anymore. Recently, my mother got very sick, she's been in the hospital for awhile and isn't well enough to be able to live with us currently, I don't know if ever. I don't know what will happen to her. She doesn't seem interested in making the changes necessary to live, and with how bad things are getting I don't think it's helping her find motivation to get better. I cleaned my home and I was quite proud of my work, and it made me feel better. Then, I step outside and see a letter taped to my door we're getting evicted. No warning, email, or call, this was solely relayed to us by this unprompted letter. (While we pay rent monthly, it's late by a week due to the situation with my mother making money difficult.) I'm completely crushed because of this on top of everything else going on, I've cried all day and felt my heart break. I loved it here because I had previously lived in a really awful apartment for years since I was born, so this was the only decent home I've known and I'm distraught over losing it. I don't know where will we go now but I don't have any hope it'll be any better then the previous, horrible apartment I lived in as a young kid. For years, I had nightmares about that place, and would wake up grateful at least it was a dream, but I guess I don't even have that blessing anymore. It's going to be extremely difficult figuring how to move while also handling the situation with my mother, and it makes me sick no matter how hard I'll close my eyes, this is my reality and I can't wake up from it. I could scream and beg on my knees and give them the saddest of sob stories and I doubt they'd change their mind to let us stay. I can't even stand being in here knowing I'll have to leave soon anyway. Thanks if anyone read through these long paragraphs of rambling. I graduated last year and wasn't sure what the future held, but I guess it isn't anything good by the looks of it.
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learned hopelessness
Depression Support / by Born1From1an1Egg
Last post
 April 1st, 2024
...See more This is mainly just a vent post because I have no one else to talk to. I haven't logged on here in awhile, and nothing much has improved since then when looking back at my old posts. I used to feel soul crushing heartache because of how lonely I was, and still am. After years I finally recently got "used'" to it, and in my final efforts to talk to anyone or attempt to make friends, it made me realize how it only made me feel even worse because it was so trivial to even attempt anymore.  I don't like being alone, I loath it, I imagine talking to someone all the time, but people truly couldn't care less if I disappeared one day just makes me feel worse. I've become so cynical and hopeless I feel like I was meant to be alone forever like it's some type of curse. I just feel so alien from everybody else. 
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Why is friendship impossible
Relationship Stress / by Born1From1an1Egg
Last post
 May 17th, 2022
...See more How do people make friends? It's so difficult, I don't know what's wrong with me. I talk to people with the same interest, hobbies and we seem to be a good fit yet they always ghost me without reason. I just feel like I have the plague or something, offline and online.
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Favorite Cartoons
Depression Support / by Born1From1an1Egg
Last post
 December 21st, 2022
...See more I don't know if this would actually get any replies but I'm curious if anyone has any cartoons they like and want to share.
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Woah
Depression Support / by Born1From1an1Egg
Last post
 December 17th, 2021
...See more Friend who has been ghosting me for months now randomly messaged me "Who?" out of nowhere. Can't tell if they literally don't even care enough to remember who I was or sent it as insensitive mockery. I feel rather stupid, realizing this person only ever talked to me to bad mouth their other friends and only used me as someone to complain to. Saying things like they preferred me over them, only to choose them in the end. I guess this is pretty senseless but that single word message really hurt a lot considering it's implying they don't even bother to remember who I am, let alone exist. Can't stop dwelling on that message even though I am aware I shouldn't let this be bothering me this much. I truly don't have anyone, it wouldn't make a difference if I simply stopped existing one day if no cares or remembers I'm here to begin with.
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lonely birthday
Depression Support / by Born1From1an1Egg
Last post
 December 11th, 2021
...See more No one bothered to wish me at a happy birthday or at the least speak to me. I don't know what else I expected, this is just like any other day but it just hurts more on my birthday for whatever reason. The pain of being a forgotten nobody is unbearable anymore. Never had a birthday party before or anyone to to spend time with on these days which is growing increasingly more depressing for me. There is nothing to get joy out of it and I hate the concept of growing older because of everything else I've missed out on that should be normal for my age. I really wish I had the chance to be anyone else besides myself, this sucks.
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