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CalmRosebud
28 342,982
L Paragon 9
5 star rating
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If I’m not here, then I may be gazing at a bird, or listening to the rustling of the wind.
Number of ratings49 Number of reviews43 Listens toOver 18 LanguagesEnglish Listener sinceMay 4, 2020 Last activein last week PathStep 4,053 People helped174 Chats3,366 Group support chats2,061 Listener group chats143 Forum posts1,590 Forum upvotes4,217
Bio

𓇢𓆸♡ Hi, I'm Cal♡🌹  𓇢𓆸 Welcome, human! You can try messaging me, but please, no guarantees on a quick response, as I am often away from 7 Cups. My schedule does not permit scheduled chats at this time. However, I will always do my best. Once in a great while, you may see me in a Sharing Circle🌹

Recent forum posts
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Actually Listening
Group Support / by CalmRosebud
Last post
August 21st
...See more Hey everyone! Quick thoughts on something I’ve been working on lately: Actually Listening.     Most of us jump straight into "fix-it" mode the second a friend vents. We start giving advice, telling them what to do, or subtly judging the situation. But honestly? That usually just shuts people down.     If we want to really be there for each other, we need to switch things up:   * Zip the advice: Seriously, just hold back on the "you should do this" comments.   * Zero judgment: No critiquing, no lecturing, and no deciding if they are right or wrong.   * Validate them: Just let them know you hear them. A simple "man, that sucks" or "I get why you're stressed" goes a long way.   * Trust them: Give them the space to breathe and figure out their own next steps. They’ve got this.   Love ♡ and Courage 💪🏽, Calm Rosebud 🕊️🌹
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Sharing Circles: where the magic happens
Group Support / by CalmRosebud
Last post
June 12th
...See more The "magic" of sharing circles lies in their ability to transform isolated personal suffering into a shared human experience. When people speak honestly and listen deeply, the psychological environment shifts from one of judgment to one of mutual support.     Irvin Yalom, a pioneer in group psychotherapy, identified "therapeutic factors" that explain how groups heal people. Sharing circles activate several of these core psychological mechanisms.       Core Therapeutic Mechanisms (Based on Yalom's Work)     * Universality: Participants realize they are not alone in their misery. Hearing others voice similar fears, shames, or struggles shatters the illusion of unique isolation.     * Altruism: Members experience a psychological boost by offering support, validation, and feedback to others. Being helpful to someone else raises self-esteem and provides a sense of value.     * The Instillation of Hope: Seeing peers who have processed similar trauma or difficulties gives newer members concrete hope for their own recovery.     * Imitative Behavior: Participants learn by watching. Observing how others vulnerability model emotional expression, boundary-setting, and self-acceptance allows members to adopt those healthier behaviors.     * Catharsis: The physical and emotional release of unexpressed feelings. Speaking the "unspoken" in a safe container lowers physiological stress and provides deep emotional relief.       The Broader Psychological and Physiological Benefits   * Vagus Nerve Regulation: Safe, non-judgmental social connection activates the parasympathetic nervous system. This lowers heart rates, reduces cortisol, and brings the body out of fight-or-flight mode.     * Shame Dissolution: Shame thrives in secrecy. Bringing hidden parts of oneself into the light of a compassionate circle strips those thoughts of their toxic power.     * Enhanced Mentalization: Listening to diverse perspectives helps participants understand that others have distinct, valid inner lives. This builds empathy and improves outside relationships.     * Cohesion and Belonging: Human beings are biologically wired for tribal connection. The deep acceptance experienced in a circle satisfies the fundamental psychological need to belong.       I wonder if you have “felt” any of these effects during or after a Sharing Circle.   Please choose one (or more) and share your insights on this thread.  
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Engineering motivation
Motivation & Accountability / by CalmRosebud
Last post
May 9th
...See more I saw this online and thought I would share it here. Thoughts?
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Sixth Cupsversary — Calm Rosebud (Monday, May 4, 2026)
Group Support / by CalmRosebud
Last post
May 5th
...See more Six years ago, I signed up to be a Listener here on Cups. Most of the time, I was facilitating Sharing Circles, the place where everyone is equal, and the place that is most in line with my thinking that every participant has something to contribute to the therapeutic mix. I researched and am an avid fan of this sort of group therapy, especially since the origins of this kind of group passing a talking stick originated from Indigenous Peoples and forms a powerful spiritual ancient connection to this sort of inner and also community work.         When Sharing Circles are at their finest, when people stay for a whole session of an hour to share as well as to participate in supporting others as best we can, Sharing Circles can be magical and transformative in their effect on individuals and on the collective of those who participate. For those of you truly interested in group work, “The Theory and Practice of Group Psychotherapy,” by Irv Yalom (6th edition) is an excellent text for a start. I attempted to start a thread discussing this book here: https://www.7cups.com/forum/groupmod/SharingCircles_2066/BookDiscussionTheTheoryandPracticeofGroupPsychotherapyYalomandLeszcz_323877/ [https://www.7cups.com/forum/groupmod/SharingCircles_2066/BookDiscussionTheTheoryandPracticeofGroupPsychotherapyYalomandLeszcz_323877/]         I also take on some “needs reply” requests, as I feel able to respond. “Needs reply” seems to me the closest to people arriving at their most vulnerable. You are asking for help, but you have no idea who will answer. It’s my goal when responding to these pleas, to deliver a “soft place to land,” with directions to find other resources on 7 Cups or outside 7 Cups, if that is what is needed. I don’t report my participation as I’m not caring so much about cheers and leaderboards, but it’s something I do, sometimes up to five or so replies a day and sometimes zero.       These two places seem to me like the most interesting places on 7 Cups. The thing I find most remarkable about 7 Cups is that there is a corner, place, or job (unpaid of course) for everyone.       I’ve participated in over two thousand group support sessions! That’s an average of over 333 groups a year! Wowzer! You can see that on my profile. Don’t worry! I too was surprised at that number. Snuck up on me. Proud of myself. I have no idea what this means, since yesterday I did an experiment, the number was at two thousand and two, a big enough number. Then I hosted two hours, and it went to 2012, so how this participation is counted is beyond me! Embrace all the numbers! Suffice it to say, I have “done time” on Cups. I can open and shut rooms! I can gently remind you of guidelines or even delete your message if you’re way outside guidelines. Kind of like church, when a Babushka threw me out for wearing jeans. That church had a dress code. Thankfully, my current church is a bit more liberal when it comes to how we dress.       As far as what I believe as a Listener, my values align closely with Cups expectations. I believe in our internal impetus to improve ourselves, to grow and flourish based on our wellspring of wisdom we can nurture through healthy living. Something I read a long time ago was, “Where there is poison, there is antidote. To heal, turn in, turn in.” Each of us contains a world within us, a fascinating place with many possibilities. Let’s choose wisely where we decide to focus!       Since I have studied psychology a little bit and the field of education a lot, I lend the perspective of someone who is more in the Vanaprastha (retirement/hermit stage, approximate age 50-75), where I am gradually withdrawing from material life and social/professional responsibilities and obligations. While I still run a business, I spend most of my time writing and creating, as well as tending to nature.       I feel like my job here on Cups right now is to guide the next generation and focus on spirituality. I will probably continue to pick up hosting a session of Sharing Circles once or maybe twice per month. I may also visit some of the rooms as I am able. I will probably also try to answer some of the pleas that pop up on the “needs-reply” channel, health permitting. Yesterday at church, I listened to a most excellent sermon on the topic of “gratitude.” This restored my waning sense of the importance of noticing what is around us, appreciating it, and being more mindful of the bounty at our fingertips, so maybe I will open and host a Gratitude group for those who are interested. Otherwise, my participation is limited, and that’s ok.        What I encourage youth (and even elders, for that matter) of today to do, is to spend lots of time away, away, away from electronics and devices, and yes, even platforms such as 7 Cups. Our brains are so polluted with all the electronic garbage that is assailing us daily. The false pressure to succeed materially is fostered by inflated and artificial needs, mostly. We learn to ignore survival needs, those of sustenance with whole foods, surrounding ourselves with calming sounds and physical routines that tire us out naturally so we can sleep deeply and interact with others fully.         I just heard yesterday of something called “heuristic homeostasis.” It was tied to a verse and message (church sermon: the parable of the paralytic (John 5:1-15), but I researched it afterwards, and it turns out, it’s this absolutely fascinating (and capable) ability by humans to use “rules of thumb” or simplified mental and biological shortcuts by organisms to maintain stable internal conditions (homeostasis), in complex, unpredictable environments. That’s all of us, isn’t it? The vibes created by excessive materialism and the bombardment of the capitalist patriarchal military industrial complex to compete and destroy rather than create, is an “insult to the soul in a petri dish” that spawns much of the mental illness and stress that I see swirling around me today.     Reading a book in its entirety, savoring the words and thought that were put into it, closing my eyes and listening to the sounds around me, these are a couple of the things for which I give gratitude.       In the end, what seems to matter most to me is a few good friends. My work is all towards noticing the little things, while embracing the really big thing of trying to create peace in the world. Slowing down is a value of mine, though when I’m focused, I am quite capable of moving quickly towards my goal.       I spend lots of time in my garden, tending wildflowers, and my rose garden, with its variety of roses: White Lies, Alfred Sisley, Pink and Bright Red. I love taking photos of blooming peonies, echinacea, impatiens, columbine and daisies. I photograph lichen, foxes, deer, chipmunks. I just put sprouts in (sweaty work) for growing my own food on our little piece of land: seven varieties of tomatoes, cucumbers, thyme, marjoram, basil, parsley, sweet red, yellow and orange bell peppers, arugula to follow. We let the dandelions on our land propagate so there are plenty of dandelion greens for the base of my morning salads. Right now, I’m typing this sitting outside and listening to the Robin Red Breast, Carolina Wrens, Red-bellied Woodpeckers, Carolina Chickadees and Tufted Titmice delivering a concert, just belting it out there for the whole world to hear.        Many times, I will just shut my computer and enjoy days without any outside electronic interference. Sometimes I will start by writing out: “This will be my peaceful day.” I’m one of those people who is capable of “living within a metaphor” or within the written word.  This is one of the reasons I have enjoyed the “Way of the River” series authored by @GlennM.       I have (in the past) toyed with the idea of running a group, a sort of “club,” to read certain textbooks that I feel are helpful to the development of an inner core or strong sense of being, such as Yalom’s “Hour of the Heart.” I started a thread about this book here: https://www.7cups.com/forum/listenerjourney/SelfCareandFun_2246/ReviewanddiscussionofHouroftheHeartConnectingintheHereandNowbyIrvinDYalomandBenjaminYalomHarperCollinsPublisher2024_355577/ [https://www.7cups.com/forum/listenerjourney/SelfCareandFun_2246/ReviewanddiscussionofHouroftheHeartConnectingintheHereandNowbyIrvinDYalomandBenjaminYalomHarperCollinsPublisher2024_355577/]       I’m past the point of achievement for the sake of achievement. I do everything I do now for the sake of inner satisfaction. Anything that brings grace and beauty and nourishment to my life is the direction I will travel. There are many people here on 7 Cups. You carry with you the Essence of that which I seek, the authenticity to be yourself even in a world that insists on creating stereotypes. “No mud, no lotus.” Everything looks messy once. Get messy to bloom on.         I am grateful for all of you. I wish you all the best. I enjoyed sharing with you today.         Take care, be well. May peace be with you.       Love ♡ and Courage 💪🏽, Calm Rosebud 🕊️🌹       P.S. No Artificial Intelligence was used to write this to you, save the artificial intelligence provided by google to look up certain terms so I could be sure to be accurate. Isn’t it more fascinating to read actual original thoughts? Haha, maybe not! The editor on my Word program kept wanting me to be more concise. Too bad! (I mean, have you met me? “Verbose” is my middle name: Calm Verbose Rosebud lol.)       P. P. S. Yet, since the ironies never cease, the illustration here was created with the use of Artificial Intelligence. I put a prompt into a free program called Canva, and it generated this. I found the sandals amusing as I would not be caught dead in flimsy shiny sandals such as these, but I didn’t have the energy to “school” the AI as to accuracy. Also, thanks to AI for the thickness of the hair, and the slim build, all inaccurate. I tend towards sturdy and muscular, being a person who lives and eats with gusto. I hope not too much water was wasted in creating this silly image.         
Feedback & Reviews
Kind listener. Thank you
Thank you so much ❤️🥰
Was an incredibly helpful chat. She was able to relate to me with personal experience and I felt very supported and encouraged!
Such a helpful person, I really didn’t feel like I was being judged or looked down on
Very great and lovely listener deserves all the kindness love and support from the universe!
Really connected with this listener and looking forward to continuing to chat with them. They seem to really understand me and be open to supporting me throughout my journey. I am very grateful to have found them. ❤️
Absolutely lovely chat! I felt well supported :)
Rose is the bestest person ever she is amazing and so so supportive and so so helpful loved talking to u so so much rose-Hugglellllllessssss
Rose is very caring and generous. I love her hosts. Its a happy time in sharing circle. I wish we could have her more . I have always found her very fair, honest, reliable trustworthy and compassionate to all sharers. As i have had a few chats with her over my time here and shes always left me feeling both validated and heard. A truely kind and loving listener .
CalmRose is a wonderfully compassionate and empathetic listener. While sharing with her my feelings and opinions, she valued what I had to say and was very honest on my next steps as to what to do. Her support made me feel empowered and I felt like I had a huge support system after talking with her. She was quick to understand what I was going through and so vigilant to assist me in finding how brave I can be. She is motivating- not just with her words but the meaning behind those words. Truly someone that listens, is honest and understanding, navigates issues very well and can guide you to the right path, and Rose builds a rapport and connection with you that I do not find in many listeners. I recommend you reach out to Rose and have a chat, not only will she help you, she will help you make you feel brave and able to take on anything.
This is a beautiful soul . Both on cups and off. I really am appreciative of her kind worth and words. Shes always availble even in crazy hours to me. A true hero.
I reached out to Rose from a sharing circle and we connected in an amazing way. She allowed me to open up and offered great perspectives. Anyone going through anything would be lucky to talk to Rose! Shes my new rock!
Absolutely amazing listener, the best that I have come across on this app. She listened, supported, respected, and helped me find courage in myself. Thank you.
Rose was calm, patient and easy to speak with. I'm glad I connected with her.
CalmRosebud- an excellent person to reach out too. This listener is very empathetic, caring, and understanding. I felt right away they could feel how I was feeling and through our chat, was able to help me re-assess myself and as a team we worked together on many different strategies in healing and loving one's self. Rose is such a sweet and superb listener, I could not have asked for this amount of support.... I truly appreciate our chat Rose and that you are so knowledgeable, that any member who reaches out to you, can be so lucky. Thank you for being there for me and I will continue to come back for more listening sessions with you!
Rose, you are amazing and I appreciate you so much. You aim to make everyone feel accepted, heard, and loved. You are fun to talk to, and an amazing listener and friend. Thank you 🐢
Absolutely lovely listener to chat with. She really does take the time to understand you!
Very friendly and helpful. Down to earth and very respectful
Good listener and has a heart of gold. does not judge. wish there where more people like this. happy I came across her.
Absolutely lovely listener to chat with!! I feel like she understood me so well. 10/10 :)
She listens and replies really quickly. She truly made me feel understood and I appreciate it.
Tas you are a excellent listener you are always listen to me ,understand ,show respect we have made a really good relationship ,you make me feel better whenever we talk thank you for being apart of this community everyone here will be lost without you you bring alot here thank you tas 🦁❤
Violet was very empathetic and helped me get out of a dark spot.
Tas is such a wonderful listener. She listens actively. Is super friendly, a great person to have conversation with. She is full of wisdom, thoughtful and a warm positive energy. Highly recommended.
Kind and patient with lots of resources
Great listener
Violet is amazing. I would highly recommend them.
Violet is very kind and insightful
an awesome listener
She's sweet and understanding. I feel really light and calm after sharing things with her
She is by far the absolute best Listener and Moderator on 7 Cups! I wish everyone could have such a great experience and interaction on this site. She is kind, thoughtful, and just plain awesome! I always feel better and more connected after chatting with her. VioletVeritas, please know you rock and are so appreciated!
She very careing heart ❤️ and great Listener
Very helpful and caring
Violet has been very nice to me. She speaks to me in group chat and talks to me in private messages. She seems to enjoy speaking to me and does not get bored.
Lovely very caring listener
Rose is the most amazing listener on 7 cups. I love talking to her. She makes me feel heard and cared for. She listens so empatheticaly. She is awesome.
Rose is the most amazing listener I have met on 7 cups. They are so loving and kind. Their warmth is healing. I feel really cared for when I talk to them. I am happy that I met them here.
She has such a beautiful soul it radiates through to everyone she touches.
from the short time, they were very attentive
She is helpful and active. Long replies, I like it
Great listener. Liked talking with u
Good one😎😎😎😎😎🤩🤩🤩🤩
Thx for listening
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