Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
CatLover6057
143 M Embraced 1
PathStep 7 Compassion hearts11 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2019 Member sinceDecember 10, 2019
Bio
Recent forum posts
CatLover6057 profile picture
Friendship advice? Feel left out due to friend having new boyfriend
Relationship Stress / by CatLover6057
Last post
 December 11th, 2019
...See more If this already exists, I apologize. My main reason for joining 7 cups was to hopefully have a friendly person to talk to about my latest bugaboo so to speak. It's been going on for a few months, but got worse over the last two or so. I met this young woman online through a fanfiction writing site, and we became friends in the span of a couple days because she loved my writing. Then we got to talking on Skype, then moved to Google Hangouts when Skype was being a pain in the butt. This was in January of this year, middle of January coming up will be our 1 year friendship anniversary. January to February was okay. March was bad because she was gone for a whole week to New Orleans for her birthday and Mardi Gras (We live in Virginia). And she didn't even talk to me while she was gone, and spent the entire week with her other friend that goes to college down there. When she came back she was all like 'I miss you' and I was just so upset with her I didn't talk to her for a couple days. I admit I may have been in the wrong, but if I don't hear from anyone after a certain amount of time I figure that they don't give two figs about me anymore. But we eventually started talking again, and she went back to her job. April came around, she didn't wish me a happy birthday even though I mailed her a birthday card for hers in March. So that was probably a sign of something, or she just forgot. Don't know. May was dicey, since her grandfather passed away. So she once again left for two weeks to head out to Colorado, which I understand. I know that family is important, so it is better to be with your family than talk to someone online you never met face to face. By then she had quit her job, and we spent more time talking once she returned from Colorado. June and July were okay, we were upset that our favorite hockey team didn't get to the finals but we figured they'd come back and do well the next season. August is when things started going downhill. She got a new job, that wasn't the issue. I totally understand about work and how weird hours can be, among the fact that you can't control your schedule or what times you work. Well I can in my job, but she probably can't. I don't know. By the time my county fair came around we made plans to meet since I was going to be going that day. It ended up not working out because she went to the fair earlier while I was at work and had left by the time I went there around 5 because the rest of my family was up. Then sometime in September she told me about this guy she met and really liked him, plus they were going on their first date. And I was wondering when the heck this happened, she didn't mention anything about a boy in August or at any time before she blindsided me with 'I met this really nice guy, he's so sweet and funny' One date turned into two, then three... and so on. Then she started accusing me of berating her for having a boyfriend and being in a relationship. I didn't berate her, all I told her was 'Oh.' I didn't say I hate you or anything like that. I may have said I disliked her boyfriend, merely because I didn't know anything about him. She didn't tell me his name, what he does, etc. For all I know he could be a serial killer in disguise (or I watch too many cop shows) but it worried me. And it still does. October she said she got them promise rings, after only a month of dating. I'm 41, I've seen my fair share of puppy love, and this seems like a really bad case to me. And to me it seems way too fast for promise rings. By November she said that he's the one she's going to marry, after only 2 months of dating. Plus she went to his relative's house for Thanksgiving. I never went to my ex's house for any holiday, but that's a different story. I'm sure times have changed now from when I was younger. This month it's all about her boyfriend, and I'm scared because Christmas and New Years are big proposal days along with Valentine's Day. And I just have a gut feeling she'll be texting me with an I'm Engaged! text or post it on Instagram/ Twitter. We used to talk on Sundays, those are gone now because they are all exclusively for boyfriend. And I feel left out, like I'm a breadcrumb or a piece of cat litter that one of my cats kicks out of the box. She barely talks to me anymore, and when she does it's all about her boyfriend. And I don't want to hear about him. I just want to talk to her, not talk about him. I just know his name, that's it. I don't know if he has a good job or if he even works, or if he really loves her or not. I'm at the point that if it goes south, I don't want to be there because of how she's treating me. I told her my feelings and she just goes on about how I have to accept she won't be around all the time because she has a boyfriend now, so she'll be with him a lot more. I just want to tell her, I'm autistic not stupid. I understood the first two times you told me that statement. I'm so sorry that this is all over the place, I'll do my best to clarify if needed. I didn't want to make this longer than it already is.
Search more from @CatLover6057
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
8 total badges
Hand Shake First Post Debuted Reaching out First Compassion Meet & Greet Teammate Forum Friend
Report an issue