Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Chepelink
58 M Embraced
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts5 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2020 Member sinceJuly 3, 2020
Bio
Recent forum posts
Chepelink profile picture
Possible professional exploration of getting back with an ex, worth it?
Relationship Stress / by Chepelink
Last post
 July 4th, 2020
...See more Nice to meet you, new here. I broke up with my only girlfriend just about 6-7 months ago. We had a relationship for almost 14 years. It started well until I decided to go to study abroad my PhD. We kept our relationship for the duration of the study and I returned three years ago. However, in the last year of the PhD we grew apart. When I returned we found ourselves in a situation where we have changed, her specially. She made her life without me and I not longer was part of her priorities in her routine when I came back. It is understandable, after 5 years of living alone. We tried to make it work but we couldn't. Before the separation we talked about it. For her, the reason that the relationship was falling apart, among other things, was because she was scare that I leave her alone again. That she replaced me with friends, family and her career. That, in a way, she was free to do whatever she wanted at any time. That she made a life there. And that she not longer knew what she wanted in a relationship. So, we broke up. But we tried to stay friendly to each other and keep sparse contact. For me, it wasn't working. I still have feelings for her and the sparse contact we had made me feel like I was still in that long distance relationship at our worst moment. I decided this week that I wanted to go no contact, maybe forever, to heal. I talked to her about it and she said that things hasn't changed for her. But that she wanted to try again. She didn't said anything because she thought she was selfish when I was trying to heal. But she came with an idea. Why don't we go to counseling to see if we have a chance to fix this, ourselves, or to have a better closure. I found this sensible. So, I agreed. Now I started to have second thoughts if that really is going to help or it is better to just end this once and for all. To start healing. Could professional help can help us determine if the relationship is worth saving or that we are in the point of not return? Kind regards.
Search more from @Chepelink
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
4 total badges
Hand Shake First Post Reaching out First Compassion
Report an issue