Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Hope2000
4,879 M Seeking Light 7
PathStep 10 Compassion hearts94 Forum posts15 Forum upvotes8 Current upvotes8 Age GroupAdult Last activeJune, 2022 Member sinceSeptember 28, 2016
Bio
Recent forum posts
Hope2000 profile picture
Am I making a big deal out of nothing?
Relationship Stress / by Hope2000
Last post
 June 8th, 2022
...See more I try to not take that many things as serious as they seem to me. Yet I get a weird feeling around the partner of a friend of mine which wants to be friends with me. For example he had a chocolate syrup we were eating apple cake with ice cream and his sister wanted some of it. He said no in a slightly aggressive tone of voice and said he has got it on his birthday so with a tone on the words he decides. And I do not exactly know why it bothered me that much. He is right It is his gift and his food and he can decide however he wants to since he bought it. It just reminded me of a spoiled kids attitude a little that doesn't wanna share their toys. Granted he is an adult and can decide what to do with his food. After he said it wouldn't even be good mixed together trust me. Another thing was I spoke to him about a joke that I didn't consider a joke more of a racist stereotype. And tried to not be too call out about it before I even began talking about it was like wanna just adress it without being strict about it or something between those lines. He was very shocked that I didn't know he meant it as a joke about people saying that. Talking about how he himself called out one of his dad's friends for saying it. Did you really think I said that in a shocked way or I would say that?! I didn't say anything that is the reason that I had addressed it after all. And I said when his sister said she didn't find it funny in an apparently sarcastic way. I also told him I've also said I didn't find it funny. And he said how mean. I still can't understand his character at all. How would it be mean if at the time I took it seriously which wasn't the joke he intended to make and secondly not finding something funny is an opinion. And he also said why didn't you find partners (my friend) joke funny about himself being a foreigner. I said because it's about him, but I also didn't register at the time why is he comparing his behaviour in the first place? It hurts my brain every time he interacts with someone there is something in his behaviour that makes me feel off. For example I was talking to a lady at the store because I've noticed she had a persian accent just like my family. I've told her I've noticed your accent is persian. And he managed to talk more to her and about himself. Not that talking to her would have been wrong necessarily. It is just that he talked about Italy and how he has no ties to Italy genetically but it feels like a home to him. And talking about it's probably the same for you and Persia. Thought to myself does he know it is in Iran? And tried to brush my thought off. I don't know don't speak that much to random strangers and I initiated the conversation and he somehow made it about himself. It's weird to me how every time I'm around this person I'm second guessing myself and what I think of every social interaction. I don't consider him a bad person and he does a lot of nice things for me and he definitely wants me to like him. I just don't want every time I address something that makes me feel uncomfortable for him to react in a self defensive way. He also forgets a lot of things. So after I take the time to reflect why something felt weird to me it's hard to say hey you said that to me. It's a I would never say that and if I did didn't mean it that way but I can't imagine I would say that because I want you to like me. I'm pretty sure that by the book he would say that I should address things that make me uncomfortable. But he is always in arguments or stress with his partner which is my friend or his family busy. And it feels like the wrong time to address something and even if I do address it. I don't like the way he reacts to it. Like a collection of reasons why I would hate him in the future or this self defensive response to things that make things even harder to share.
Search more from @Hope2000
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
22 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Quintet Super Active Chief Chat Honest Voice Confident Voice Power Voice Strong Start Milestone Journeying Strong Reconnect Lifting Up First Post Reaching out Helping out First Compassion Helpful heart Bundled Teammate Forum Friend Strong Bond I
Report an issue