HopeManifester6 Member Profile

...See more I know my mum always has the best intentions for me but her keep telling me what to do in a tone of demanding instead of advising makes me sad and anxious. I hope one day she can understand my feelings, allows me to express myself, and will hear me out. I don’t know how to talk to her about my feelings because whatever I say, she will make it all about her and she will always be the victim. I don’t think she does it intentionally and I don’t think she realises what she does isn’t right. I want a close bone with her, but her words are often judgmental, hurtful, and disheartening, which made me built up a wall between us. I’m putting on guard, I’m being a bit distant because I’m scared to start a conversation with her. Because it truly hurts. And I hope one day she can respect my choices, treat me like an adult, and give me the freedom that I need. Going to a gathering with friends or attending a friend’s party at night with your mum calling you to rush you home when you’re 26 years old is beyond embarrassing. And I hate it. It upsets me so much. It makes me feel like I have no control over my own life. My mum always nags about how much freedom she has given me growing up. In her defence, she never been too strict with my homework or my study. To me, that wasn’t freedom, but rather negligence. I always felt neglected growing up. I always hoped she would give me guidance on my study like giving me pep talks and stuff. I always hoped she would be proud of me for the littlest things I tried my hardest to work on. In fact, growing up I would always try very hard to impress her just hope that I could see a “I’m so proud of you” reaction from her. Till this day, I haven’t successfully done so. So her definition of giving me “freedom” has never been freedom to me. To me, freedom is when she would trust me that I would make the right choices and I would free to follow my choices, because she’d respect me and my choices. I really hope this day will come soon. I’m 26, I’m so emotionally drained from being treated like a 6 years old. Having to consistently making up lies just so you can hang out with your friends at night sucks. I’m sorry that I’m all over the place. I hope I’m making sense. I’m so exhausted emotionally and mentally.

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