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Jojo76
220 M Embraced 2
PathStep 15 Compassion hearts17 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes6 Current upvotes6 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2019 Member sinceDecember 12, 2015
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New here, and at a loss...
Depression Support / by Jojo76
Last post
 March 1st, 2016
...See more I'm new to this site, and I'm really hoping that I can get some help here. Only people that have gone through these feelings can really, truly understand where I'm coming from. Just a quick backstory: I was in an emotionally abusive marriage for 16 years that I just got out of about 2 years ago. I have 2 children out of the marriage that are with me full time. I work a 40+ hour a week job, and also have a house that I own to maintain by myself. I feel so overwhelmed sometimes. I've been dating someone for a little over a year, and things seemed great at first. But my insecurities, depression, and anxiety are constantly coming into play. I always feel unloved, alone, sad, miserable, and negative, no matter what my boyfriend does or says. I cry a lot. I feel like I have no patience with my kids. I feel a lot of times that everyone would be better off without me. My boyfriend suggested that I keep a positive thought journal. He bought one for me, and had encouraged me many times to use it. The problem is, I can't see any positive, so I have nothing written in it. I would have plenty of negative thoughts, though. I am drowning in negativity, and it's killing my relationship, and my relationship with my kids. It has been suggested to me several times to talk to someone or get on medication, or both. But with all my responsibilities and with my post divorce health insurance, I don't have the time or the money for that. So I thought I'd come here and try to just find some people who have been where I am, and have some kind of feedback as to how I can pull myself out of this. Thanks in advance.
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