Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
Kathy1212
2,076 M Hopeful Heart 2
PathStep 200 Compassion hearts47 Forum posts107 Forum upvotes132 Current upvotes132 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2021 Member sinceMarch 27, 2020
Recent forum posts
Will I ever heal?
Trauma Support / by Kathy1212
Last post
 May 5th, 2020
...See more My childhood was very dysfunctional and it was pretty traumatic. I was sexually, emotionally, and verbally abused. Then in jr. high I was sexually harassed by a group of boys who ganged up on me. When I became an adult I had 2 boyfriends who beat me. One almost killed me. I've had other traumatic experiences as the years have gone by. I've been to therapy a number of times, but one therapist was very unethical and took advantage of me when I wasn't coping well. I feel so alone, and often wonder if I will ever heal. I'm having a lot of problems in my marriage now. I'm working with a counselor on 7 cups and she's great. I'm having so much trouble managing my emotions though. Things get to me a lot more than most people. I'm way too sensitive, and get hurt very easily. It's very difficult for me to trust anyone. I felt so discouraged yesterday that I seriously considered suicide. Will I ever heal or are there some people who just never do? I've been struggling my entire life.
My Story
Trauma Support / by Kathy1212
Last post
 April 4th, 2020
...See more Hi. I'm new here, and I'm a bit nervous. I have a history of childhood sexual abuse. About a year ago I discovered that my husband had been using pornography behind by back for several years. I went into shock because that was not the man I knew him to be. I felt very betrayed and that he had lied to me for years. I couldn't believe that I had no idea. There were no signs of what he was doing that I could see. All of this triggered my childhood abuse issues, and at times I feel so angry with him for bringing this into my life. I have Betrayal Trauma which is basically PTSD. He hurt me so deeply, and I feel that he has a moral duty to help me heal. Apparently, he doesn't feel the same. I feel so isolated and alone. I can't handle all of the pain in my life. He says he loves me and that he's sorry for what he did. I would never know it from his actions though. He starts arguments with me a lot when my stress level is already so high. It's seems like the rest of the time he ignores me. I want him to understand how deeply he hurt me, but I don't think he will ever truly get it. I want a safe and secure marriage. I want to feel safe. I don't want to be constantly triggered. I need to heal from what he did and the abuse.
Search more from @Kathy1212
Community updates
Talk to an expert therapist
After a stint at corporate finance, my lived experiences and interest in people...
Badges & Awards
23 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Chief Chat Honest Voice Strong Start Reconnect First Post Debuted Reaching out Helping out Appreciated Voice Contributor Community Collaborator First Compassion Member Oath Traumatic Experiences Forum Companion Forum Helper Forum Buddy Meet & Greet Teammate Forum Friend
Report an issue