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Kelleyd83
230,689
L Genius 5
5.0 star rating
Rating
Number of ratings803 Number of reviews185 Listens toOver 18 LanguagesEnglish Listener sinceApr 27, 2015 Last activein last 6 months GenderMale PathStep 1,539 People helped1,242 Chats2,914 Group support chats77 Listener group chats7 Forum posts47 Forum upvotes100
Bio
Hi, welcome to 7cups.  


It's my pleasure to help you with whatever it is you may be going through.
Recent forum posts
To those struggling with addiction to pornography
Addiction Support / by Kelleyd83
Last post
 October 10th, 2018
...See more Hi. My name is Kelley. I am a 34 year old white, cis-gender male. I have struggled with addiction to pornography my whole life. I want to help people heal as I have healed. Addiction to porn started when I was 10 years old, in fifth grade. I got a sensation when I looked at nude bodies in my father's playboys. Then computers came out in the 90's and so did the internet. By the time high school rolled around, I was full on engulfed in porn addiction. At first, pornography disgusted me. This was the original emotion I felt. "How could these women like doing this? What is the point of degrading women? Why are the men doing this to these poor women"? It made me feel uncomfortable with humanity. But I thought, "if I can't beat these people, I will join them". I started masturbating incessantly. I would do it in the bathrooms at school, in restaurants. I would stay home from church and masturbate 6 or 7 times. I didn't know what to do with the feelings, so I exploited them, much like the girls in the videos were being exploited. It was a degraded feeling after I would ejaculate. I felt guilty and ashamed, as I'm sure many young men do. In high school, I met a girl. We would have sex and I would feel nothing. I just wanted more, and she provided. I gave her no choice. If she didn't, I would break up with her. She ended up breaking up with me when it turned into an obsession, on my part, with sex. I felt nothing. I asked myself on the way there, "did I love this girl?" I couldn't come up with an answer. I was 16. After two more failed relationships with girls hwo I would have sex with regularly, and two others which were spontaneous one-night stands, I stopped trying. I didn't want to hurt anyone anymore. I turned to pornography, started masturbating to very hardcore things, and thought, "this is normal, this is alright". When people would look at me funny because something was off with me, I thought, "it's there problem, not mine". I started blaming my family for my interactions, and when they didn't know what to say, I turned to drugs. I smoked marijuana after school every day for two years. Again, in my mind, this was normal, natural, fine. "It's just what kids do" I would tell myself. Then I found myself exploring other mind-altering street drugs. LSD, magic mushrooms, ecstasy, cocaine, methamphetamine, etc. This led to darker, more miserable places, frustration, and ultimately a whole lot of pain, even horror. Eventually I was diagnosed with a mental illness because no one knew what else to do. I depleted my father's bank account on many occasions. He paid for intensive psychotherapy, mental wellness programs and tried to get my on medication. This ended when I was drunk on the streets yelling that people would get shot. I was put in a psyche ward for 3 days, then onto residential treatment for 3 months. By then, I started taking medication. The point of me telling this is I'm ready to talk about my experiences. I'm ready to help people struggling with sexual issues, drug abuse, and other things. I am ready to tell my story and to start on that long road to healing. If it hadn't been for certain people in my life, namely my mentors and family, friends and relatives, I would have died a long time ago. I have seen three friends commit suicide. I have seen all sorts of bad stuff, heard voices, the whole nine yards. But I now know that life is good, there is a plan, and we can all be free of any type of addiction. I want to help. Much love to everyone on this site! Kelley
So scared
Trauma Support / by Kelleyd83
Last post
 July 21st, 2016
...See more I've put up with so much hate in my life. I want to talk now, but it seems like everyone else is louder than me. I don't know how to talk anymore. And sometimes I don't know how to shut up when I have to. I have a lot of self-hatred and programming, but also a lot of self-awareness. I need a therapist to help me with my recovery and also to help me get a grasp of my own hidden rage and anger. Sometimes I just want to hide. Sometimes I have intrusive thoughts and feel like everyone is just pissed at me. Then I blame myself for it. So I think I just need to focus on self-care and be quiet, reserved and cooperative for awhile so as not to ruffle any feathers. I don't want to have a loud voice. I want to be soft and gentle. I want to stop being violent, degrading and mean to people. I just want to be a normal human being. Oh, and I was sexually abused, have schizoaffective disorder, but am recovering. I don't know if listeners are supposed to seek support on here. I guess I could have switched to my member account. Oops. Thank you for listening. I don't like being judged, controlled or manipulated or hated. I just want to be myself.
How does one get over the feeling that everyone hates them?
Trauma Support / by Kelleyd83
Last post
 April 16th, 2016
...See more I often walk into a place and feel negative energy. I don't know if this is my own projection, or if it's real. I've experienced all sorts of trauma in my life and still get scared/triggered by a lot of things, people and energies. But I keep moving forward. What helped me with my fear that everyone hated me was journaling and meditation. For a long time, I was pretty sure I was right. There WERE people out there who hated me WITH A PASSION. But as I journaled and meditated (and journaled and meditated some more) I came to realize that most people are just out there doing their thing. Most people don't see me. One of my favorite all-time quotes by philosopher Alain de Botton: "For paranoia about 'what other people think': remember that only some hate, very few love, and almost all just don't care." I have a type of disorder which causes me to be paranoid of others, and I've been battling my own demons of rage, anger and fear for a very long time. But let me give you hope: it does get easier if you KEEP WORKING on yourself, keep working on your relationships, and keep working on learning to love yourself. This has done more than anything else. I want you to know that you are most desperately loved. Even the ones that "hate" you have nothing against those who love you. Be an ally to yourself.
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Feedback & Reviews
She was very understanding, emphatic, and it was easy to talk to her.
He really tries to listen and understand you, whilst providing some advice! 😄
She was a good listener.
Great listener. Thanks so much!
He helped me with advice and insight when I was in a dark time tonight
Very good listener, we had a nice fluid conversation and really just got to talk about life!
Polite, conversational, and quick to replay. Didn't go way off topic of make me feel pressured to discuss things I wasn't ready to discuss, either
asekd good questions
thank you so much for listening to my rants
amazing listener
Really put things together for me in my mind. And made me realise alot
thank you
She's doing well as a listener.
Really helpful.
thanks
really friendly and empathetic
Im so glad i got to talk to them. They understood my problems more than anyone and i could tell that they wanted me to genuinely feel better. They help a lot of people but still reply so quick and know exactly what to say, I hope they get just as much care back as they give to people
Very friendly and understanding
He;'s a kind man.
He's a warm guy. Nice to talk to.
Thank you
This user was incredibly sweet in every way possible and really listened to what I needed to talk about. They made sure I talked about everything I needed to.
Good guy.
He was very attentive, and was great for breaking the ice on using 7 cups for the first time.
Nice and understanding of my situation!
Very understanding, had a lot of confidence in me when I had none in myself. Thanks Kelley!
Thank you for answering my questions
Very nice guy, he listens and asks the right questions :) thank you!
Wonderful person. Really heard me out and I feel so much better! Thank you Kelley.
A great listener.
Attentive, great advice. Best listener I've spoken to
Seems good.
He helped me realize things about myself that I never knew before.
Good listening skills
He was great
I was awful but you were great
He was a good listener, and I appreciated that
He's been great
Absolutely amazing!
Did a great job.. just wish that we could have chatted more. But, people have to sleep.
Good feedback.
Good listener.
Good listener.
Thanks for and ear or a keyboard and a screen lol.
This guy is hysterical in addition to being an excellent listener :-)
So thoughtful and understanding and just so wanting to help. Wish there was more people like this in the world 😊
Top notch listener, managed to get into very deep things and perhaps find out something about my inner self - positive or negative.
Listened to me with great feedback. Was very help
I was nervous to be chatting with a stranger at first, but I found this conversation to be super helpful!! They were understanding and empathetic, and did very well reflecting back to me!!
Good listener
Great work
this time was worth chatting with this person...
great help. opened my eyes to something i never saw before
Thank you
Great listener.Helped comfort me
Amazing individual. Honest and great conversationalist.
Amazing listener!
Very supportive and encouraging! And real!
Enjoy the honesty and encouragement!
Very amazing, good listener, I give him 1000 star's😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁😁
A very kind person.
Nice guy
Divine intervention
Super nice, I was super worried stressed out and depressed but I feel slightly better after talking to kelleyd83
very helpful
great experience
super sweet!
Lovely conversation, He put my mind at ease and made me feel listened. Thank you!
Kelleyd83 was the best listener I have had on here. They really understood what I was saying and gave me space to talk. They answered quickly and I felt they related to my really well.
thank you for read me all the things i needed to say :)
really nice person! funny, open minded, would love to talk to them again!
Wonderful person
awesome supportive and insightful contributions. short, sweet and very helpful.
Fantastic
I think she/he ran out of solutions for me but I appreciate the empathy anyway
She really understood a lot of what I am going through and she shared her own experiences which helped me reflect and feel better about what I'm going through.
Very helpful! Sometimes we just need somebody to listen and that's all
cool person
She is asking questions and being very nice too! Very helpful!
Kelley was very kind. She acknowledged my remarks and had a sense of humor that helped lighten my spirits. I appreciated her.
Thank you
Awesome! Easy to relate to!
Kelly was on point and very insightful in giving me food for thought! I cannot recommend this listener enough!!!
Very kind and listens attentively! Thankful to have her!
They were very supportive and also really good at reading the mood of the conversation and matching it. Thanks for the help!
Very supportive and good listener.
He help get me out of my despair. He loves.
The best Listener I ever had
Thank you for the approachable, friendly, calming, insightful conversation. Feeling related-to and heard in an entirely non-judgemental way have added to the already positive and welcoming space you have created, even in the middle of a prolonged flashback. I am not writing this review because of a moral duty or custom, but because I feel it is the least I can do after being acquainted with you.
He's very nice and really related to my issues. I felt like he was personally invested in making me feel better, it was cool. Like I had a friend who cared about me.
Great empathy & understanding! Validates what you're going through
Great talk! I felt like I related to you so much and you gave me some tips and advice that I will take to heart. I think they will really help me get through these tough times or at least be a start in helping me. Thank you and take care. :)
Good talk, decent listener. Thanks!
Very easy going person, very kind. thank you.
A very real and honest person! She cares and help me realize a lot about my situation!
he is a great listeners,really helped and was a great experience
Really responsive and a really good listener. She helped me feel like I'm not alone struggling with what I'm dealing with.
Very good listener, very helpful! May God bless Kelley83. Thank you!
She's great... i love talking to her, i feel safe knowing i'm not the only one feeling the way i am feeling about my mental illness
Very good listener. Talked me out of my anxiety spiral quickly and let me make my own conclusions about my feelings. Great listener
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