Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
MylaR0si3
141 M Embraced 1
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts10 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2022 Member sinceJanuary 8, 2022
Bio
Recent forum posts
MylaR0si3 profile picture
Is this sexual harassment? my friends say it is.
Trauma Support / by MylaR0si3
Last post
 January 14th, 2022
...See more So I need some help trying to understand something and also how to confront the person that did this thing to me... I'll give some background so it all makes sense. I'm in a 3 group friendship consisting of myself, one of my best friends and our friend (who I know from school but my best friend knows through other thing). It was my best friend's 18th birthday in december just gone and she had us 3 over (we are our own covid bubble) and a few other friends (all clear of covid and we social distanced etc). We had a fun night but the other friends eventually went home and the 3 of us were left in her house as we were staying for a sleepover. So now the uncomfortable part... My best friend had an important thing the next day so she slept in her own room and myself and the other friend were given her sister's room who was away at collage in Canada. (we didn't mind this). This is like 1am. Everything was ok for awhile after we said goodnight and myself and the friend had gotten into bed. It was like maybe a queen sized bed so we had just enough room between the two of us. We said goodnight again and I turned off the light. Now, realistically I don't think many people fall asleep within 5-10 mins of closing their eyes when not super tired (I don't anyways) so I was wide awake for what happened next ..... So my friend must have assumed I was asleep because this girl masturbated right beside me for the next HOUR. I don't want to make peopele uncomfortable and get into all the details but I knew I wasn't going crazy because you could hear everything and this girl was shaking/grabbing the covers and huffing and puffing. I don't care what people do behind closed doors, it's frankly none of my business, but I do care when they do stuff RIGHT BESIDE ME. She also had the audacity to call out my name seeing if I was awake HALF WAY THROUGH! I didn't respond because I was literally just frozen in like shock? and could u say fear? like I just felt like I was going to throw up and I eventually pretended to abruptly wake up "because I needed the toilet". She also asked me as I was leaving if I could bring her back a glass of water and I was trying so hard to not show the look of disbelief at her because I was so mad and sick and confused because she is also like really reserved about some things and I was NOT expecting she would ever do something like this to someone. Like it just ruined my night and I felt so disrespected or like my personal space/morals had been intruded on if that makes sense. I locked myself in the bathroom for a bit coz I started silently crying because I was just so freaked out and I didn't know what to do. I eventually went to the kitchen so just sit away from her but when I didn't come back with her water she ended up coming into the kitchen and stay sitting RIGHT BESIDE ME for like 10 mins even when I told her I didn't feel well and I just needed to be alone for a bit. Eventually I decided I was fed up and I was CERTAINLY NOT getting back into that bed with her so I said I was gonna sleep on the couch. I went to the sitting room and she was beginning to follow me and I just turned around and went "I'm really sorry but i'm not feeling well, I'm tired and I want to be alone" and I just closed the door on her. I didn't get to sleep until 5am coz i was just all over the place. That morning I got my stuff sorted as quickly as i could and when my mum came to pick me up I said goodbye to my best friend but gave a shorter bye to the friend/basically blanked her as I was heading out the door. I had to sit through my aunt's birthday brunch that morning not being able to do anything or offload. I told my friends in school like a week later who both myself and the friend sit with and also my other friend group to get a different opinion (as they don't really know her that well) and both agreed it was basically sexual harassment because whether it was intended to harm me or not (especially if she actually knew I was awake or not) it still did (mentally) and it was unwanted (obviously). So now my actual question is (a) is it sexual harassment because I genuinly do feel violated and (b) how in the **** do i bring this up with her. I'm not letting her just do this and "get away with it" because it was not and is not ok. I need some help figuring out how to approach her with this. I told my best friend too a while after and she now thinks the friend might have done this with her another time but isn't sure because she was actually half asleep. So the friend could have done this on multiple occasions and that's quite disturbing to me. I hope someone will be able to help me, Thank You :) xx
Search more from @MylaR0si3
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
7 total badges
Hand Shake Linked First Post Reaching out First Compassion Teammate Forum Friend
Report an issue