Oliviacourtney95 Member Profile

...See more Sorry if this a long post. Hi my name is Olivia, and I've been unemployed since Janurary. I quit my job due to severe anxiety and depression and these past couple of months it has really taken a toll on me mentally. I didn't even quit properly, I just didn't show up one day because my anxiety was that bad. A month later I wrecked my car, and that is when stuff really started going bad for me, because not only was I without a job but I had no way to get around either. A month after that my parents and lil brother moved to Australia which was massive change for me because I was homeschooled and didn't move out until I was 23. They are my everything and not being able to have them here next to me really hurts. Before they left they gave me my mom's old van so I could use it to get around and find a job. The issue with that is my boyfriend who Iive with, also wrecked his car( a week after I did) and because he is already employed, we thought it'd be easier for him to use the van for work. I thought I could handle that you know because I've been unemployed before...until I realized I can not provide for myself at all, which is extremely stressful. I literally can not buy anything for myself, and that's including food, clothes, feminine products, cannabis(which I use as medicine), or even fun stuff like video games or books. It makes me feel like a child, which makes me feel incredibly sad because I am 24. Now this past month and a half I've been dealing with health issues. My vision has been blurry, i've been dealing with headaches and IBS. I've been freaking out because I'm worried a tooth infection I had(or still have) has spread to the rest of my body due to not taking proper care of myself. I'm on medical assistance and can't see a doctor until August, so instead of being able to enjoy my summer, I will be freaking out about my health for 3 months. Everything seems to be going wrong and it's all my fault. If I would've kept my job, I could've gotten car insurance, and I would still have my car. I had years to go to the dentist and doctor under my parents insurance, and now it's all too late for that. All I seem to do is self sabotage. Sorry I don't really know where I am going with this thread, I just need some kind of outlet even if people don't respond. My boyfriend has no idea I feel this way because I know he is stressed out enough as is.

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