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OmegaWolf80
1 13,652 M Pacing Forward 10
PathStep 123 Compassion hearts1,832 Forum posts37 Forum upvotes67 Current upvotes67 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2025 Member sinceJanuary 3, 2020
Bio

She/her

20 

Recovering from toxic relationship

ocd/anxiety






Recent forum posts
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I don’t feel valid
Trauma Support / by OmegaWolf80
Last post
 November 24th, 2021
...See more TW: s/a Finally, nearly 5 years later, I’m recovering. I can go about my day without thinking about it. Instead of seeing his face in everyone, I just see people. I’m finally beginning to move on. However I still deal with guilt and I don’t feel valid. That it “wasn’t that bad because you weren’t r*ped,” or “he was just a kid he didn’t understand what he was doing was wrong.” Nobody ever told me those things, they’re what I keep repeating in my head. I know that just because my trauma wasn’t “as bad” as someone else’s doesn’t make it less valid, but I still feel like I’m not. I read other peoples horror stories and feel guilty that I ever complained about my life. Some friends I’ve made on here, if I was them I’d be dead many times over. I’m still disgusted, an 11 year old boy doing such gross things to an 11 year old girl? He was old enough to know better. After all I knew immediately it wasn’t right. I still let it happen for several weeks because I was scared. I’m still scared to tell anyone except my mom, not even my friends know. I’ve come so far but there’s still so far to go. On another note, now I think I’m asexual, but I don’t know if I truly am or if I’m just damaged and afraid of intimacy. How can I be so scared of touch and so starved at the same time? Would I have been this way without my trauma, or not?
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Finally healing
Trauma Support / by OmegaWolf80
Last post
 July 29th, 2021
...See more It's been 4 years since my trauma, and I just now began processing it with my mom and close friends. I was so scared to before, but I feel better now that I finally had the courage to. My trauma happened when I was almost 12, and I'm now almost 16. In the past few years I just realized how messed up it really was, when before I was young enough I didn't really understand what happened, other than it wasn't right. I'm finally beginning to realize that the truth is freeing. I'm so glad I finally have the courage to begin to move on.
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Pre-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) Awareness
Depression Support / by OmegaWolf80
Last post
 October 19th, 2020
...See more I feel like PMDD is not well understood or heard about a lot, so I wrote this to inform people about it as someone who suffers from it. I understand it may be embarrassing to talk about, but it's also very important. All girls have heard of PMS, right? Right before "that time of the month" when you get cranky, irritable, moody, and all you want is to eat chocolate. PMS is normal, almost all girls experience it at some point. PMDD is similar to PMS, it is characterized by mood swings around the time of menstruation. However, don't confuse the two. PMDD is like PMS on steroids, and can be crippling to some. PMDD can cause feelings of depression, anxiety, hopelessness, self esteem issues, outbursts of anger, drastic mood swings, along with countless other symptoms, as it often presents differently. Many women are often misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder, when in reality they are suffering from PMDD. The worst cases of PMDD can even cause suicidal thoughts. PMDD can interfere with work, school, relationships, and overall well-being. PMDD is thought to be caused by a sensitivity to the female hormones released after ovulation, with symptoms appearing up to two weeks before the period starts, and disappearing again as hormone levels drop soon after menstration starts. It returns monthly, often changing in severity depending on the amount of hormones released. It also has many physical symptoms ranging from cramps, bloating, weight gain, acne, and even migraines. PMDD can be treated with anti-depressants or birth control pills that lower hormone levels thought to cause PMDD. Proper diet and exercise and getting important vitamins can also help regulate it. If you suspect that you have PMDD, keep a mood tracker and see if your mood tends to be significantly more negative around menstration, more so than PMS. If so, it's a good idea to talk to a healthcare provider for more help. Thank you!
OmegaWolf80 profile picture
I feel like I should be over it by now
Trauma Support / by OmegaWolf80
Last post
 June 7th, 2020
...See more TRIGGER WARNING It's been 3 years since my abuse. I wasn't raped or threatened, but I was repeatedly groped every day by a classmate for a month. I think I'm still carrying regrets, I only told to stop the assault, and I stood up for my abuser saying "maybe it was only an accident." Of course, saying that, he didn't get into trouble. I knew that was a lie, I knew he knew what he was doing because he always did it discreetly. Now I live in fear that my failure to stand up for myself is going to cause him to hurt other girls worse than he hurt me, I feel like someone is going to get raped and it will be my fault because I didn't warn people about him. It's something I don't have control over because I am no longer in touch with anyone where I was assaulted, and I know that. But it still bothers me sometimes. (I was diagnosed with PTSD before I was assaulted and this made it worse, but since I have recovered that I don't think I qualify for PTSD anymore. It still worries me sometimes though)
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