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PainedAndConfused
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PathStep 1 Compassion hearts21 Forum posts14 Forum upvotes11 Current upvotes11 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2020 Member sinceAugust 21, 2019
Bio
I suffer from chronic pain, chronic fatigue, hidradenitis suppurativa and depression.
I love animals and travelling!
Recent forum posts
Am I being silly? (long post)
Relationship Stress / by PainedAndConfused
Last post
 March 14th, 2020
...See more I am not sure if I am just being silly so I wanted to ask people's opinions. I am disabled and spend all my time at home, I get very bored doing not much all day as my chronic illnesses prevent me doing much. My husband works full time and leaves early morning and gets home between 6-6.30pm. We have been married a long time. He will come home and start playing his games which I am fine with as he will need to relax after work so I understand. The thing is I seem to be a last thought now. He will come home, play until around 8pm when I get some time where we will watch a movie for around 1h30 although he will be on his iPad on facebook or reddit a lot of the time. We used to chat a bit more and laugh or whatever at the movies. Now it is a lot of silence and him on his iPad anything from 10 mins on a rare day, to more likely half of the movie or longer. When the movie is over he will go on his iPad so I now just go upstairs as otherwise I am sitting there in silence. We then watch one tv ep in bed whenever he comes up, usually an hour or so later and he will go to sleep. Often while he is gaming when he just comes home I will say what happened in the day if something happened (we have had floods here so I have been trying to sort that), or any form of chat, and he will not listen to me and literally pull a face like I am disturbing him. I just end up saying "nevermind" or "doesn't matter" as I waste my breath. I can even talk for a while thinking he is listening and he isn't and again acts like I was disturbing him. On a weekend he will get up about 8.30-9 (I sleep in due to my bad health) and game until around 5 although sometimes earlier but never before 3pm. We then watch some movies (movies and tv is what we both love) while he looks at is iPad most of the time as usual. Am I doing something wrong? This seems not normal and it never used to be this bad. I let him have gaming time as he gets stressed sometimes at work so I want him to be happy and relax, but now it seems that is more important. Or I am just being stupid and should forget it? I have brought it up before ages ago (it has been going on a while) and he snaps a lot of I bring up things he doesn't like so I don't mention it much now as I don't want to get semi shouted at. He generally snaps at things like that. that is his new personality so I try not to trigger him. I am very lonely as I am stuck in all day everyday due to disability etc so I look forward to him coming home but I feel he might as well not be here. I used to game a lot years and years ago to kill the boredom froming being at home all day but he told me be didn't like it I stoppped as it was too much I guess. He plays and/or looks at his ipad more than talks to me and honestly we can barely speak as he doesn't talk much now and as I said before if I talk I seem to be distracting him. Am I just being silly due to my low mood and lonliness?
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