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PeanutButterMurph
393 M Embraced 3
PathStep 17 Compassion hearts63 Forum posts11 Forum upvotes34 Current upvotes34 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2023 Member sinceJune 4, 2023
Bio

I am the proud dad of two amazing little humans and two astoundingly tolerant rescue cats. I love doing outdoor things with my family and engaging in solo pursuits like reading, walking, and running. I am also a person who is trying to get more skilled at managing treatment-resistant major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder.


Recent forum posts
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Reaching a Milestone
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 October 5th, 2023
...See more I felt the need to share this: Yesterday marked 60 days since I last took a drink. A lot has happened in that time, and I spent a lot of time in treatment/therapy. I have a lot of work to do still. But this time really feels different than previous attempts at living sober, and I'm excited for the next 60 days.
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Experience with SMART Recovery?
Alcohol & Drug Addiction Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 July 2nd, 2023
...See more I'm newly sober again after a weeklong visit to the inpatient psych unit. This time, I want to stay sober. I've tried AA twice in the past and decided it's not a good fit for me. Now, I'm considering attending a SMART Recovery meeting as an alternative form of support. I'm wondering if anybody else has had luck with this group or can share about what it's like. Thanks.
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Feedback for your supporters when they don't quite get it
Depression Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 June 7th, 2023
...See more TW: I discuss self-harm ideation in the following post. ... ------------------------- Let me start by assuring that I am safe. But I'm going through a rough patch in my depression and recently experienced and shared suicidal ideation with my wife, who shared it with my parents. I received support and empathy, but I also received a response from a family member that left me feeling even worse: "Think of your family. You have a promise to keep." I know this family member's heart was in a decent place. I'm married with two young children, and of course the last thing I want to do is leave my family with a legacy of trauma. As one who has dealt with trauma and depression for a long time, I understand what's at stake. I never want to burden my family like that. At the same time, reading their words left me hurting. I didn't choose these thoughts. I don't turn them on or off at will. They are symptoms of a disease. I'm left to wonder: How do I tell this person that adding guilt to someone going through this level of suffering and suicidal ideation is probably not the best move? I did some internet research. I found a lot of articles about how you should talk to somebody who is suicidal. But not a lot about how you shouldn't. This "reader response" [https://www.stuff.co.nz/stuff-nation/17223560/Stop-guilt-tripping-your-suicidal-loved-ones] post from a New Zealand website reflected my thinking but it's not exactly an authoritative source. Is there an empathetic yet effective way I can communicate to my family member that their words stung me and that there are more helpful ways to respond if I share this level of suffering in the future? Thank you.
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New here and struggling
Depression Support / by PeanutButterMurph
Last post
 June 12th, 2023
...See more I joined 7 Cups a couple days ago when my depression was a little lighter and I actually felt like taking steps to get better. Although I've been managing my depression and anxiety for over 25 years, I've lately found myself in a particularly bad patch. I'm not sure if this is the best spot in the sub-community for going into the details; I'm still learning my around this platform. So I'll keep this brief. PBM P.S. It took a lot to write this because currently I don't want to do much of anything.
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