Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
ProblemsAndNotMuchElse
1,354 M Little Steps 4
PathStep 57 Compassion hearts23 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2016 Member sinceJuly 27, 2015
Bio
Recent forum posts
ProblemsAndNotMuchElse profile picture
I have been depressed for 7 years and its only getting worse
Depression Support / by ProblemsAndNotMuchElse
Last post
 April 24th, 2016
...See more I am 18, Im starting college in new york city in september, moving in there, and I feel like im in no way shape or form ready to do such a thing. I feel like I am bipolar, I and very happy and then extremely sad to the point of self harm and wanting to kill myself. the only thing preventing me from doing such things is my girlfriend whom I've been with for 9 months now, I love her in the sense that ive never cared for someone so much, obviously we both know no knot has been tied, but I am so dependent on her. All i ever think about is her, what i can do for her, when i can be with her, not because im obsessed, but because i dont want to be lonely, in my parents basement pittying myself, insteam she gives me a reason to go out in the real world and do things, instead of being a closed antisocial 6 foot teenager who isnt happy. but i have extreme ocd that is related to her thats so bad i get to the point of hurting others and her, not physically, but through my actions. just yesterday, this stranger who owned a store supposedly touched my girlfriends butt trying to get by her, she told me afterwards, all i could do i swear and get angry about it with her, as she tells me to calm down. I eventually lied to her saying i was going to buy a lemonade, instead i went back in the store and told the man that he is a pedophile for touching her ass, and that shes 15, ill never forget the image of him saying "are you out of your fucking mind" and then telling me to get out of his fucking store, i told him to watch it, and flipped him off and said fuck you asshole. i made a scene. i went back to my girlfriend, she was never so angry and disappointed in me, and she said i didnt do it for her, i did it for my ocd, and it was true, i broke down and cried like a usually do when this happens, i realize what im doing to others, its like snapping out of a different personality. I need help, im hurting others and I dont know what to do, Im dependant on someone who doesnt make me as happy as I thought she would, maybe she isnt the one for me but I cant help it, I want to be happy with her, ive helped her get out of a very bad and destructive life, shes like a different person now. I just want to be happy.
Search more from @ProblemsAndNotMuchElse
Talk to an expert therapist
In life, there will be stress and challenges that make it seem difficult to...
Talk to Ashley Now
Badges & Awards
13 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Quintet Super Active Chief Chat Honest Voice Strong Start Reconnect First Post Reaching out First Compassion Bundled Strong Bond I
Report an issue