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Snoo96123
1 85 M Embraced
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts7 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2021 Member sinceJanuary 4, 2021
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New to Long Distance - how to maintain a good relationship
Relationship Stress / by Snoo96123
Last post
 January 5th, 2021
...See more I've been with my boyfriend 2 years, he just moved across the country 2 months ago and so far we've been able to see eachother three times. We work well together and a lot of our relationship we have been apart at different schools etc., but never so far that flying 5 hours is the only way to see each other. So in a lot of ways we do handle long distance very well. However, I just got back from a trip to visit him and the morning of my flight has me uneasy. I was upset to be leaving, understandably, but my boyfriend was very annoyed to see that I was crying (he isn't one to show a lot of emotion). Although I was mostly crying about leaving, he was annoyed that I was crying because he was fed up with the tears. Two times throughout my stay, I broke into tears about comments he'd make. Mostly about my lack of motivation and laziness and wishing I was fit to go and keep up with him at the gym. I'm very self concious and aware of what he was telling me. I don't like the way I look, refuse to take photos with him for that reason, am unmotivated to study for a important professional exam coming up. He on the other hand is such a go getter and over achiever he is incredibly disciplined and is doing amazing. I want to be more like him but have failed a lot . Anyways, he called me always miserable and felt bad for me because I do nothing with my life, so although I was crying for a very good reason(leaving him), he was upset that I was miserable which made me more upset because he wouldn't even console me and was angry. The whole morning was awkward, I really didn't stop crying, and we didn't really talk to eachother. We didn't savor our final hours, instead we ruined them and seemed to have ruined the rest of the good time we had. Thinking back on it I'm full of regret and sadness those are the last moments we have to remember each other until God knows when. I'm also hard on myself knowing he's in a new city where he can meet someone more like him and stop a long distance relationship. I mentioned something along those lines after I left through text, thanking him for the trip and that I loved him. He ignored that whole worry I expressed to him and only said "I love you too". I'm working on getting my act together now so that the next time I see him, I'm a better version of me for him but also more importantly for myself. I just hope that it isn't too late.
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