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The80dog50
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Listens toOver 18 LanguagesEnglish Listener sinceMar 20, 2025 Last activeover 6 months ago GenderMale PathStep 4 People helped0 Chats0 Group support chats0 Listener group chats0 Forum posts11 Forum upvotes13
Bio

I have been reading a lot of psychology and I think I’ve made a lot of mental progress. I’ve learned how to validate and be a good listener for my friends and I hope you finally feel seen, understood, and that your not crazy for feeling how you feel.

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Feeling stuck, gaining then losing momentum over and over again.
Work & Career / by The80dog50
Last post
 July 22nd, 2025
...See more * Right now, I feel fed up with myself because I'm in this dance of trying to be productive (eating healthy + working on this passion project), but I crash, also I can't ignore my past. So I keep trying to fix it by reading about certain problems I have, but sometimes I feel even more disregulated. That disregulation makes me feel a pull toward bad coping mechanisms, but I want to keep reading because it feels like I can finally put words to why I felt so bad as a kid. It feels like I've been on a boat subjected to the waves of a storm, and these books give me a glimmer of hope for salvation. It feels like I'm being understood, and it's eye-opening and relieving. But a part of me thinks I'm just wasting my time because, despite looking into my past and feeling like I'm healing in some ways, it feels like I'm getting worse because I've used those bad coping mechanisms more, and look physically worse. I'm not having the results I want, and being consistent with what I want to do. It's like I'm running on a hamster wheel. Usually, when I feel this, I wait until I become motivated or there's some sort of deadline. Now that I think about it, I think I should set my own deadlines for myself, like s.m.a.r.t. goals. I think accountability partners made me feel judged, and when I was a kid, any sense of failure felt like my parents were going to abandon their love for me, and it left a scar and can make me a bit sensitive. I've been trying this sort of self-talk routine while observing how I feel in my body, and it can work for a bit, but sometimes I think I feel overwhelmed. I found this pattern, and I can see that I felt like staying as invisible as possible would get me the least amount of attention, so I would self-sabotage because if I succeeded, it could mean attention, but eventually it felt like I would receive negative attention. I don't know why that small part of my routine falls off I'm open to any answers. I should probably get some therapy, though. I want to start sharing on here more, and I feel like once I get comfortable with that, I can do other things that require more vulnerability. Like I'm thinking of working a 12-step program. I wish someone would give me suggestions, but in a kind non non-demanding way, cause I'm still trying to get used to being vulnerable to people, and one of my parents always offered me advice when I did things and over time I think that lowered my self-esteem and basically gave me the message that I can't do anything good enough. I want to be the kind of person who works for long and consistent times, and that's probably for some external validation and to feel better about who I feel like I am deep down, and buying some stuff for my parents and doing whatever with the financial freedom I would have would be pretty cool..
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Categories
Depression
Managing Emotions
Work Stress
Bullying
Eating Disorders
Anxiety
Self-Harm
Sleeping Well
Breakups
Family Stress
Exercise Motivation
Bipolar Disorder
Grief
Loneliness
Student Life
Relationship Stress
Borderline (BPD)
Self-Esteem
Addiction
Dissociative Disorders
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