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UnicornKitty84
105 M Embraced 1
PathStep 25 Compassion hearts6 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2016 Member sinceNovember 7, 2016
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How do I walk away from a EUM?
Relationship Stress / by UnicornKitty84
Last post
 November 12th, 2016
...See more I can't find my original thread but I talked how my "boyfriend" was withdrawing from whatever the heck we have. We saw each other one night, and it was a confusing time. He said a few things that didn't make sense. He said he was hard to date (think "I'm no good at relationships") and that he knows it looks like it's always a booty call. I didn't even bring up the booty call thing - he did. He said he enjoyed my companionship and that he liked watching me go inside the house, but I didn't get a chance to ask why because that was when we realized his car battery had died. But he said he would send a text once he got home to let me know that he got home safely. I didn't receive a text until several days later, with an excuse that he lost his phone and he had to charge it. I knew he was lying. But I had sent him several texts days before saying something was still bothering me. I told him exactly why I was still confused because we jumped from not talking at all to the very open and loving side I've never seen, and he went ghost on me again. Then I started wondering that maybe something is up. I spent all night Googling and reflecting on our "relationship", and now that rose-colored glasses are off, I can't believe I missed the signs. At first, it was a whirlwind. He was pursuing me like no one ever has. It felt great! It was like he was treating me like I deserved the world, taking me out, buying me things, buying me a phone, putting me on his data plan, and acting like one of the sweetest guys on earth. He at one point said after telling him no one has ever treated me like that "Like what, a human being?". He even had his friend create a song video for me, and I thought it was the sweetest thing ever. Now I see it was manipulation. But he never called me his girlfriend, I only met a few of his friends and he never introduced me as his girlfriend, even after 4-5 months. I never met his family, or his son. He said I couldn't meet his son unless we were discussing wedding plans. He said he lived with his ex-girlfiend and that there was nothing romantic between them, but he cared about her because she was the mother of his child. Then the moment I showed any sign that I was starting to "fall" for him (which I now know isn't what was happening - I was falling in love with his potential and the potential of us), he pulled away immediately, only to reappear a few weeks later for a day or two, and then go ghost again. He kept saying "I'm not a phone person. I prefer to talk in person.", which some people aren't phone people but at the beginning, he had no problem texting, talking on the phone, or talking on Facebook Messenger. For a while, I thought it was all me and none about him. I know I have some emotional issues to work on, but I told him up front that I was guarded because I was used for sex in my last "relationship". But somehow it feels like he used that to get inside and start acting like he "cared" so the minute I started caring, he could push and pull whenever he wanted to because he knows I think it's my problem. Now I'm doubtful he had any kind of feelings for or even if he cared at all. What makes it complicated is that I do genuinely care about him and I'm also on his data plan. It's not like I can just say "Hey arsebutt, I never want to see you again." It's not that easy when your emotions are already involved. How do I walk away, when this whole "data plan" string is what complicates it the most?
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