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...See more I happened to come across a mention of 7 cups reading an article about depression in a men's health magazine. So here I am :-) Not a particularly comfortable exercise this introduction is it?! Here goes... I was 15 when diagnosed wit bpd and major depression. Hospitalized numerous times, spent years in institutions after trying to ditch this ride. Suffice to say, the medical fraternity is quite perplexed that I am still alive, as numerous of those attempts should have left me stiff on a slab. I cannot imagine anything more terrifying than the possibility of being immortal, but having inexplicably survived so many times... It does make me wonder sometimes. But I digress, I'm 43 and living in Johannesburg, South Africa. I've not been without the dark cloud at any time since, even when I was 'happy', it was never far away. Recently dismissed at the job I had, now having to work retail lest I lose my home. (work scarce here!) Single and definately not ready to mingle, socially I'm very much a hermit. Hence I suppose the 'safe' interaction online is preferable.. How does one describe the never ending futility of existing? The only reason I don't try to get off this world again is simply because I've learned it simply doesn't work for me. There is no color, no joy, no passion, no relief. No point. But I'm preaching to the choir right?! Good to meet ya :-)

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