abracadabracherry2019 Member Profile

...See more please take the time to read if you have time. you want you can give me advice too. so i am dominican, born in DR. my parents were both born and raised there up until their 20s. they both are still fluent in spanish. growing up for some reason, i always spoke english when responding to them even when they spoke/speak spanish to me. i just feel and felt more comfortable. i always felt uncomfortable speaking spanish on the phone with family and would try to avoid it at all costs. my dad speaks english 99.99% of the time at home my mom is like 50% 50% with it maybe slightly more spanish than english. but i always respond in english. i always understand what they say. thats the backstory. ive worked at several jobs where the majority of coworkers speak only spanish. i worked at a factory a few years back, where most were dominican or puertorican, rarely any central or south americans, so it was easy for me to understand everything. for some reason it is hard for me to speak spanish at times, epically if it is supposed to be in a professional manner. understanding people from ecuador and guatemala or some other countries is slightly hard to understand because they talk fast and use different dialects and words. anyways, now i work at a pre school where literally 98% of parents and kids speak spanish. its embarrassing for me when the supervisors ask me to translate or when people ask me to translate in general.ive translated for a speech therapist and it wasnt as difficult, but today was intake day for new incoming students in the fall, and i was trying to ask one of the parents if their child has ever received services before, or has your child be evaluated. a teenage or younger adult was next to the mom and she laughed after i pronounced some things wrong made me feel sad all i said was that i am trying in spanish. i understood them but it wasn’t hard to say what i wanted to say. she ended up telling me her daughter received services at home but the doctor told them to stop because she will be coming to a school now .not even 30 min later a teacher comes and tells me that the parent said shes not concerned about her daughters speech and shes never received services. so it makes me look bad in my opinion. the mom definitely told me her daughters speech isnâ€™t good and that shes sure i could tell when i was talking to her. there was definitely a speech concern then all of a sudden theres not. its so annoying. i hate doing intakes. this is only my second school year there, i started in 2023 september. im worried about who im going to work with in the fall. this september2024 i worked with the same teacher i was with in 2023.but in october she complained about me and i got switched to another room. i do like where i am better but i asked the current teacher im with if i will be with her again in september and the assistant pretty much said of course if i want to, but the teacher said its not really up to her, they always do what they want at the end of the day i just feel useless i felt ridiculed for not soeaking spanish well.there has been several parents in general i have tried to help but failed to do so.idk what to do i want to cry.i feel so useless.i want to be connected to my culture but all i can do is understand the language, i can communicate with the kids and have basic conversations and stuff but sometimes its hard to go deep into things. what is wrong with me?

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