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affectionateStrawberries2307
328 M Embraced 3
PathStep 5 Compassion hearts24 Forum posts5 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2022 Member sinceNovember 4, 2020
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Attachment issues
35 & Over Community / by affectionateStrawberries2307
Last post
 August 19th, 2021
...See more Hi all, hope you are all well, just looking to share and looking for advice on attachment issues. I have always struggled with this for a long time now. I’m a married man 2 children wife of 7 years been together 15 years we have a house both work full time and pretty much always on the go :). My background as a child wasn’t the best and was pretty negative from what I can remember. I have read that these sorts of things things in childhood can have a impact as you get older. Basically I left my parents home when I was 18 on bad terms very bad terms which for me was like the gates opening up and I was free. I was with my partner at the time who I’m still with now, I moved about on my own for a bit different flats, bed sits anything I could get and afford. My wife stood by me all the way her father said I should move in with them :) (bingo) so I did this. For a few years I lived there and I could do a thing wrong her parents worshiped the ground I walk on. (May because of the type of person I was and was very caring and loving for there daughter) also the respect I had for them as adults been there opposite to how I had been brought up. This may have been the start of the attachment issue I latched onto my wife as it’s was the best thing that had happened to me since been at home for all those years. Time goes on and I struggled massively with emotional needs, how to express myself and still to this day I still do now. I very rarely put my own needs first and don’t have many best best friends who and we’re I can completely open up to as I see it as a weakness. There plenty of other things I could waffle on about. Im at this crack on the road at the moment where things have been a little unsettled in the relationship I’m looking for more attention from my wife and can’t always see why she can’t do this. I expect her to get back to me when I have messaged her. I need that physical connection to make my self feel okay. If it not quiet right I feel there’s something wrong. Because of suffering from loss at a young as I have the same fear now. What if she is unhappy with me (although she says she not) a lot of thing go round your head and your mind runs wild. Are there any coping strategy out there to help with attachment issues. Is it has anyone else been through the same sort of things. Thanks all :)
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Giving to much
35 & Over Community / by affectionateStrawberries2307
Last post
 June 21st, 2021
...See more Good evening all, It’s been a while since I have been on, there’s been progress in little area but plenty of more work to do. Currently still facing my demons of insecurity and feeling lonely. I have been with my wife for over 14 years now and have 2 lovely children we have our own home decent jobs (ish) pays the bills :). But I have this over hanging issue of feeling like it myself and the kids and not much time for me and my wife. She’s currently evolving as a person to better herself and I feel I’m so far behind. I struggle to put myself first. I keep giving out to my wife and children. Is that a bad thing? Possible yes at the moment. My wife would like me to be confident say how I’m feeling when I feeling it look after number one I just find it so difficult. I asked her the question what or who do you put first our relationship or yourself, her reply was herself a little hard for me to hear this as I always thought we are in it for the long run. May be you have to put yourself first?? Any ideas or suggestion? Thanks
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Working on yourself
35 & Over Community / by affectionateStrawberries2307
Last post
 April 6th, 2021
...See more Hi all, is been about 4 month since I have been on here I was in some what of a bad way last time and managed to get myself out of a hole. My question is what are you doing to keep yourself from your old way? I can feel myself slipping back into my old ways. I struggle to connect with myself at times, I’m constantly feeling like I need to be busy and only really rest when my head touches the pillow. I blame others for how I’m feeling and let them get to me. More with my wife than anything. I’m trying to listen to self help video which don’t always go in. Anyone else have the same issues? Any help or strategy to help this? Thanks in advance
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