Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav
amiableTangerine2727
158 M Embraced 1
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts6 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 1970 Member sinceJuly 15, 2015
Bio
Recent forum posts
amiableTangerine2727 profile picture
AMA recent breakup
Relationship Stress / by amiableTangerine2727
Last post
 August 4th, 2016
...See more Hi, My boyfriend of about a year and I broke up just a few days ago and I keep telling myself the sadness and pain is going to go away with time but we share an apartment and I thought it would make me feel better to see him everyday but seeing him and not talking or having any interaction is so hard. I miss him terribly. Im trying to keep myself busy but my job is lonely so I end up thinking about him and I just get sad. I am determined to give it at least a full week before even saying anything to him. I feel like we have to talk at least as housemates but I dont want to let myself hang on to hope of getting back together. We have a lot of mutual friends too so I feel even more alone because I dont want him to think I am sharing something he doesnt want them to know.  I do however keep thinking that I want to get back together with him. We broke up because for a while I felt neglected by him. He works 6 days a week and has a lot of other things going on. I dont have a problem with him working or taking care of his responsibilities but I felt like he put me last on his priorities. We talked about it severaltimes and he always sais he was trying to spend more time with me when he was available. A lot of the things he does on the weekends, although they are expected of him or things people he trains want him to do, they are things that he could easily take me to as well. I understand that he might think I am not interested in watching a training session or sitting at a tournament but I felt like after Ive told him, more than once, that I dont think we spend enough time together and he doesnt make an effort to include me, he could have done a lot more to "try" and help our relationship. I acknowledged his efforts but they seemed to me like the bare minimum he could do. Maybe I could have been more understanding of his schedule but he  didnt seem to be trying very hard to help the situation. After a talk where I told him I wasnt happy, I asked him what he thought we should/could do and after giving him time to think about it, he said he couldnt help his busy schedule and he didnt know what we could do. So I asked if breaking up was our only option and thats what we settled on.  Like I said before I dont have many people to talk to and I miss him terribly and still love him very much. If it were up to me I'd be back with him in a heartbeat but Im held back because I dont know if our break up was what he really wanted or if he really doesnt want to hurt me and thought it would be best for me. I am hurting even more now without him and ideally Id like for us to sit down and really discuss steps we can take to fix our relationship. I am saddened by the thought that we didnt really try to save it. I feel like I did my part by bringing up the problems and talking to him about them. We are both more reserved people who dont share emotions with poeple so I dont know if thats what happened, he just couldnt open up and tell me what he was really feeling because if he cares about me at all I dont want to give up when it could be fixed.  I dont know if I should try having another talk after we've had some time apart (broken up, we still see each other at home) to see if maybe he does want to try and save our relationship. Im afraid his pride wouldnt let him come to me first, but then again maybe hes fine without me and Im just tormenting myself thinking he misses me like I miss him or if he ever loved me. 
Search more from @amiableTangerine2727
Considering Therapy?
Talk to an expert therapist
Badges & Awards
8 total badges
Hand Shake Linked Chief Chat Honest Voice First Post Reaching out First Compassion Strong Bond I
Report an issue