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bipolardollii
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PathStep 4 Compassion hearts86 Forum posts27 Forum upvotes52 Current upvotes52 Age GroupAdult Last activeNovember, 2025 Member sinceAugust 21, 2025
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What's wrong with me
Depression Support / by bipolardollii
Last post
 November 13th, 2025
...See more Why do I struggle to bond with others? Even animals, im afraid to love fully. This is why my relationship is falling apart, I can't open up 1000% and my partner feels like i dont love him when thats the fuuuuurthest from the truth
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I am so scared
20 & Over / by bipolardollii
Last post
 November 16th, 2025
...See more my partner won't listen to me or talk to me, he says he wants to end the relationship because he thought i was hitting on his brother when i was just being socially awkward. he took my anxiety and my anxious behavior as being flirty when i never once showed interest in his brother. i had to resort to sending him an email because of the distant and cold treatment he's been giving me.  "I hold no particular interests towards your brother. He seems nice but I don’t feel comfortable being around him all the time like that. When you said it was annoying, I stopped it immediately and all I felt was that awkwardness I always feel when I’m in someone else’s home. I tried to relax but I felt very self conscious, very aware of my existence in a foreign space and it made me feel more uncomfortable. That *** comment from your brother was very uncomfortable, I was trying to seem unbothered but turned around because I felt really awkward."  for context, i tagged along with the two because there was a loose lizard in his brother's basement and i offered to be another set of eyes. I've only been around his brother like 2-3 other times and i take a while to open up to others (when i'm not manic). when we got home after the ordeal, we argued. he said he hated me so much and that getting me pregnant was a big mistake. he said i should kill the baby and he assumes that i don't want this relationship when i've been fighting tooth and nail for it. i've made so many changes and i have grown so much as a person (definitely thanks to him), but he always makes me feel like it is never enough.  i've cut off my friends, i've put distance between me and my family, i've been more aware of my verbage and how i articulate myself around him as to not trigger him or his PTSD, i've learned how to better manage my bipolar, but now i just feel like spiraling.  he says he doesn't mean/try to demean me or belittle me or make me feel like *** but that's what he always does, he always makes me cry. he makes me feel like everything i do isn't enough and when he said that i was the biggest mistake of his life, even mentioning his ex fiance and how they were perfect, that really hurt. i'm only NOW crying about it because he left for work and i am finally processing my feelings about it all.  now he's going down a self-destructive path while being hurtful towards me and willfully refusing to actually talk about things without hurtful words or anger. i want this to work out between us, i really do, but he makes me feel dejected and when he told me to kill the baby, i felt so hurt and rejected and alone.  all this because he misread me and refused to listen to me. he says he knows me better than myself but he can't read me AT ALL i have an ultrasound appointment and he was supposed to go with me.  i guess i'm going alone... i'm so scared of being a single mom. i never wanted to end up like this, i wanted something better than what my own parents have.
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Life becoming a nightmare
20 & Over / by bipolardollii
Last post
 November 16th, 2025
...See more every day i wake up, i feel like it's a nightmare the anxiety is overwhelming, the relationship issues are piling up, every time i think things are back on track, i did something to set my partner off and we end up back at square one i'm pregnant now, i have no job even though i am actively seeking and applying, i live in a dodgy neighborhood where i can't even walk down the block alone yesterday, things were okay up until the very end, now it's all mutated into an ugly *** vile mess and i can't take it anymore everything i do is clearly not enough, for anyone or the freakin' universe it seems
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Burnt out
Bipolar, Schizophrenia & Psychosis Support / by bipolardollii
Last post
 November 5th, 2025
...See more I burned myself out being emotional and intense I'm tired now. I have to clean up the mess at home, look into repairing the walls. Again. My hand is bruised. My stomach is upset from the stress. My body feels like it's made of lead. After cleaning up the mess, I'm going to change into pjs and sleep my life away.
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Im drowning
Bipolar, Schizophrenia & Psychosis Support / by bipolardollii
Last post
 October 4th, 2025
...See more Im drowning in my emotions and stress, im trembling as I write this I feel like im about to have another full on breakdown and that only stresses me out more
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Does this happen to anyone else?
Depression Support / by bipolardollii
Last post
 September 30th, 2025
...See more Im not sure if I asked this before or what forum this goes under so I felt most comfortable posting here But does anyone else experience apathy at the most random times? Like, this morning for example, I woke up feeling apathetic and emotionless and ignored my husband as he talked to me (I wasnt trying to, i was looking something up regarding our conversation) I still feel this way but I took my meds so maybe I'll get out of it Idk, my husband thinks its sociopathic
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The silent treatment
Anxiety Support / by bipolardollii
Last post
 September 7th, 2025
...See more My husband and I got into a little spat earlier today and he's giving me the silent treatment It's giving me major anxiety
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