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blueNest4861
1 430 M Embraced 3
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts30 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes14 Current upvotes14 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2026 Member sinceSeptember 26, 2025
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Crippling Anxiety
35 & Over Community / by blueNest4861
Last post
 October 4th, 2025
...See more Hi, im new here, im 35 my name is Ri, I was hoping someone can relate to some of the stuff I'm dealing with. I have severe anxiety that paralyzes me, the core of my issues are due to toxic family dynamics. I'm just feeling very overwhelmed and see myself in a terrible cycle that I can't seem to get out of it.
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How to feel safe? 💔
35 & Over Community / by blueNest4861
Last post
 October 1st, 2025
...See more Hi, this my first thread here. Im 35 and have extreme anxiety that can be paralyzing at times. I grew up in very unstable home, my father was verbally and physically abusive to my mother, sister, and I. My sister is older than I am and she does not rlly want a relationship, im very close to her children I love them unconditionally but due to the awful relationship between us, I dont see them as often. She gives financial support when needed, she allowed me to stay in her home, im homeless and just got laid off, due to company closure. However, she makes me feel like a burden. Im my entire life she has never asked me a personal question. No emotional support, some days she doesn't even speak to me. A sense a bit of jealousy, even though there's nothing to be jealous of. I feel like she talks badly about me to others, I haven't heard anything but her vibe is always so negative around me it starts to make me feel suffocated. Ive lived abroad for 3 yrs and came back and changed a lot of my life and she did not ask me a single question about me. Its something im used to but it triggers me. I grew up in household where I was taught that I didnt matter, that everyone is better than me, still at this age I suffer from really low self esteem but im getting better. Being around my mother and my sister triggers me. They both know I struggle with my mental health, yet they still pour gas over a fire and make situations more stressful to me. When they see me having a bad day or struggling they go out of their way to make it worse. My mother due to the abuse from my father has shutdown. My mother stopped being a mother and just a grandmother when I was 9. Fast forward, im staying at my mother's house because I got upset at my sister's and I just feel unsafe and stressed all the time. I cant afford Healthcare im looking for a job and a place to live because I cant take being in an environment where I feel hostility. Since losing my job im stuck here. I was going to get healthy, spend time with my family, focus on my mental health, and try to career, something I love this time. But I get so anxious I shutdown. I dont have any friends or family that can help. Which also gives me anxiety because I realize im completely alone, if I needed help with anything, there is nobody to call. I get overwhelmed with my age and place in life. How can I change my life when emotionally im paralyzed with fear. Just fear of getting up from the couch. I just dont know what to do. [http://me.money]
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