convivialSpruce7494 Member Profile

...See more I have been dealing with a really odd and scary feeling that just recently came over me in the last couple weeks. I have been dealing with depression and anxiety for a while with the help and support of my amazing boyfriend who I truly love. Then, all of the sudden, It's like I stopped being able to feel certain feelings with him. It's really hard to explain, and I have never felt this way before but it's like the chemical reaction that gives me that warm fuzzy feeling towards him almost just stopped. At first I thought maybe I was just really down because I was afraid to have to end things with him due to the fact that I maybe don't love him. But it all just felt so wrong because there is no way I could within a week go from being madly in love with him to just not feeling anything for him. It didn't feel right to me so I looked on the internet and found some forums about people who have felt this exact same thing. A part of me deep down knows I absolutely love him but this lack of feeling feels strange and scary. Every time I look at him now I feel such saddness and guilt that I feel this way. It gives me even greater anxiety and sadness now when I go to see him because I feel guilty for feeling this way but at the same time I know I don't want to lose someone that I truly know somewhere deep down I do love just because there is something broken in me. I feel afraid that I will feel this awful feeling every time I see him now and that that alone will be to painful to deal with so i'll have to end it. I feel like I cant win because I truly want to be with him, but this loss of feeling scares me so much that it's hard to be around him now. I just feel really stuck and paniced about this. Has anyone ever experienced this before? Or anyone have any helpful advice or resources?

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