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cpack54
1 100 M Embraced 1
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts9 Forum posts6 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2022 Member sinceOctober 21, 2022
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He thought about cheating but didnt
Relationship Stress / by cpack54
Last post
 October 25th, 2022
...See more So I was in an 8 year relationship, I’d just lost a baby and I was miserable. I joined tinder secretly because I didn’t feel loved at home. I met a guy and I fell in love with him, sold my home and left my ex who I had been with since school. long story short, I went to ibiza on a girls holiday and I found out he had been going out, chatting up girls and talking about how he had the desire to cheat on me and how he was tempted to get a girl round that night. I caught him by logging into his Snapchat, I was livid and at first he was angry too. The following day I told him he had ruined our relationships by saying these things but eventually I said I would like to give him a second chance. I told him I’d need access to his Snapchat so that I could know he wouldn’t be adding girls etc on there again. when I logged in the day after, I found that he had been asking a “friend” for naked pictures and he had been saying how she was the woman of his dreams. I was extremely hurt by this as the things he spoke with her about, like her in a wedding dress was his wet dream, should’ve been reserved for me. He said he did it as he wanted a distraction as he thought he had lost me.. although I was still talking to him, albeit upset and angry, he was apologising whilst dirty chatting this girl. i downloaded his Snapchat data and found out that whilst in the first months of dating, whilst we were exclusive, he had been lying to me and taking other girls out on dates etc. he says he thought you was a cheat and so although he loved me, he was keeping his options open as his last girlfriend had cheated on him. We officially got together in April, after he blew me off for a girl he had met that day in work. He told me he was at the gym, but really he was on a date with her. He was being weird with me so I decided to go round the next morning. I caught them in bed together. He says she tried to suck him off but he was too drunk and couldn’t get hard so they fell asleep. She says they had sex but she also went round work telling people if it wasn’t for me, they’d be together (after meeting that one time?) so he says she is obviously bitter and she is lying. he has come clean with a lot of other things, like taking the girls on dates and kissing people whilst on nights out when we were seeing each other so I don’t know why he would lie about sleeping with her too if he has? when I caught them in bed, she left and we agreed we both loved each other and it was time to stop playing games. up until the day we got together, he was dirty texting multiple women in the background, keeping his options open. then on a few occasions whilst in a relationship with me, he would flirt and get girls numbers. He wouldn’t do anything physical but he showed an interest. then obviously I went to ibiza and he was saying how he wanted to cheat on me and was saying “this is the last chance I’ll ever get to cheat, she’s already told me she’s not going away again” he spoke about a woman he met on the train home and how he wanted to have sex with her. He spoke about a girl texting him and wanting to come over too that night. I’ve never done anything to him to make him doubt me and I can’t understand why he did it to me in the first place. he says he felt vulnerable and he was drunk and he took me for granted and made a mistake. it’s been about 2 months since I found all of this out and I’m still really struggling. I have access to his Snapchat and he has agreed he won’t be going out with the boys until he can trust himself. He lets me check his phone when I ask and he hasn’t done anything since but I am hurting and I’m scared. im struggling to accept what I can’t understand and I’m struggling with feeling like he never put me first. i found out in may that I never miscarried and that I was 6 months pregnant with my exes baby. My current boyfriend told me that he wasn’t ready for a child and if I kept it, we couldn’t be together. I terminated the pregnancy for a chance at a future with him. I feel like I sacrificed so much for him and he took me for granted and disrespected me in every way and I can’t understand why. I don’t want to leave him, what was it all for if this doesn’t work? I still love him but I’m struggling immensely.
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