cupnoodles25 Member Profile

...See more a few months ago, a lost a close friend of mine. we were inseparable for the longest time. i had known her for seven years, and in that time, we had gone through a lot together. the most pivotal moments (as of now) were spent together. she would come to family events with me; and even my grandmas funeral for emotional support. it was like she was another sister to me. however, within the past few years, it seemed we had drifted apart. she would often make up things in order not to hang out with me. it hurt, and i tend to glance over that when i think back. she has done the same to others- dropped them. and seemingly had no shame about it. but in my mind she wouldn’t do the same to me. i’ve seen a lot of loss in my life, from relatives and friends dying, that i can’t help but group it together. i feel like this person has died- and it tears me apart. the friend that i once knew has totally changed- into a different person. it’s been about eight months since i said my goodbyes. in the last message to her, i said i would never stop loving her and caring about her. and it’s still true to this day. i cut the cord because i did not know what else to do. i was exhausted and desperately trying to make a one sided relationship work. i try not to discount the relationship for how it ended. i would have liked closure- and i still do. i think what hurt me the most is, two months before this, i had a heart to heart with her. she told me how she had no intention to stop caring about me- and loved me dearly. i truly believed this, but two months later it seemed that things were not the same. i never received calls, texts, or anything from her. i was confused, how could a person who used to care so much, care so little now? it was odd going from a text here, a call there, to complete radio silence. every time i seemingly tried to check in on her, i was left with no response for weeks. i didn’t want to annoy this person. it worried me. i was desperately trying to help my friend. i can’t help but think i left her at the worst possible time. i knew she wasn’t happy- and it tore my heart apart. i know that time heals wounds; but it still feels fresh in my mind. i feel like i go back and forth between caring/worrying about her, to not caring at all for several days. all it would take was one thing to remind me of her, and it saddens me. after my mom and i wishing her a happy graduation, we were promptly blocked. which hurt. i try not to think “what could i have done to make her hate me so much?”. i would love to just sit down with this person and talk it out. i want to right what i have wronged. As of today, I’m still feeling like I was torn apart and still trying to put myself back together. I don’t really go out of my way to talk about it, but it feels like it’s catching up to me. after eight months, i’m realizing that people grow apart, and you loose people. and it’s devastating to know in your heart that you thought you knew you’d last a long time.

Bio

Recent forum posts

Talk to an expert therapist

Hello, I’m Heather. 😊👋🏼 I’m here to provide a warm, safe, and...

About Us

Get Started

Online Therapy

Terms

Bio