The search for courage is daunting. The will to continue is easier lost. If we're meant for something greater this time in-between is a cost. Meaningful existence is what we're meant to find? Until then this empty useless feeling is just a waste of time. I'm waiting for something to come change my view. What ever it is needs to happen soon I need this perspective to renew. No god or mans power of words has been able to help me find courage that matters. I'm running on empty wadding thru time like unwillingly swallowing water.

tender tendencies I tend to terminate and reject.

more so if  mutual emotions, I motion to egress.

evading every endless attempt I end it like an entropic mess.

solely, i supply a simple system of emotion arrest.

failing falling forward fitting forms of social systemic tests.

woefully wondering mental wastelands wasting away wanting rest.

wishing willful welcome in this triumphant West.

blatantly,  less the boastful banter, bash my bail from becoming my best.

explaining self exemption from exuberant existence im more a pest.

not needed nervous neuro nonsense never fails nailing me it's nest.

surgically systematically selecting scheming sections of sensitive spoken text.

I say nothing, notting no one noticing not normal patterns poised on my chest .

failed again, frustrated forming a furrow in mental fields i forgo following fealty to time  remaining, choosing fraction over function and the rest.

I'd rather eat empty energy than elgulfing extreme empathy everyone says they project.

I'd rather kneel keenly to knowing knowledge tho it's not kindly kept

truthfully i tell my thoughts, timidly treading through murky at times tempting quests.

                             I'd rather not