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exuberantBlueberry2488
1 2,049 M Hopeful Heart 2
PathStep 15 Compassion hearts80 Forum posts34 Forum upvotes18 Current upvotes18 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2026 Member sinceMarch 20, 2023
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Looking to become a better person!

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Right or Wrong?
Relationship Stress / by exuberantBlueberry2488
Last post
 November 19th, 2024
...See more I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years (2 breaks in between) because he was talking about marriage and i started feeling guilty as i cannot marry him due to religion. this was august 4th, I told him id like to be friends with him when he moves on. We started texting again after we talked at a party last week. We both know that we wont get back together, but its evident we both still like eachother. Im worried this isnt healthy as we flirt a little. He told me that he doesnt know if its a good or bad thing to be texting me, and im not sure either. Opinions on this please?
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Hurt and unsure what to do (please reply) 💗
Relationship Stress / by exuberantBlueberry2488
Last post
 November 20th, 2024
...See more Before i start im sorry its long, and confusing but its certainly loads of drama so please read! Some context: in august i broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years (we broke up twice though between them) and i made this decision because i cannot marry him and he kept talking about marriage. (i promise it was for his own good) Code names: Orange = Ex, Blue = Guy best friend, Yellow = female friend, Pink = female friend 2, Purple = female friend 3 A month after the breakup, i went to a friends birthday party, and over there i was talking to a guy, and he kisses me, i pull away and i say “I'm sorry i cant orange is here”, and everyone started realising what just happened. Long story short, orange was in tears with blue, purple and yellow in a room.They wouldn't let me in to explain myself, around 45 minutes after purple and yellow come out to talk to me after everyone telling them to, i explained myself, and they said i dont understand the consequences of my actions. Purple told everyone that i was smirking while talking to them. Yellow said that i wasnt. Blue refused to talk to me. More context: Purple has been quite flirty with orange for a while when we dated Continuing, Purple started crying saying i dont know what hes been through and this and that, and that ive done a horrible thing. She heard me but she didnt HEAR me if you get me. Although most people were on my side, i was still sobbing because i had kind of lost the 5 people i loved the most out of everyone. I understand why it is wrong, which is why i didnt want to do it but either way, I. AM. SINGLE. After the party, i didnt talk to purple and yellow at all, but i texted blue. Blue has been my best friend since 2019, Hes also friends with orange. Mid august, blue would flirt with me, and i would do it back. He invited me over to his house the saturday (the party incident was on the friday) (i was very hesitant as i love orange and id feel bad, but still it was mutual) I texted him saying, “if i dont have the courage to kiss you, why would i kiss that guy” and he said that he doesnt trust me anymore and he cant believe i did that to orange. I left him on seen. (HYPOCRITE!) Yellow texts me with an apology and saying its hard not texting me and shes sorry about what happened at the party but she felt like she had to help orange in the moment. I accepted the alology. Purple texts me with a very PASSIVE apology. Saying that she said i was smirking to “cope with the situation” why would you need to cope when your not even involved!!!!! I did not accept this apology. But i said thank you regardless, and explained what happened again, but she said we need to get “over it”??? A week after that party, (heres where pink comes in) All the colours hung out and posted it on their *** stories. I obviously saw this. After a day of confusion, i texted our group chat (Me, Pink, Purple, and yellow) We have been close friends ever since 2020 as we had been in classes together repeatedly. VERY CLOSE. But recently not as. I told them that it hurt me, that i dont mind if your friends but its weird hanging out with my ex, and that i thought their loyalties would lie with me. (I introduced them to my ex mid 2022). Yellow apologised immediately, and my other friends told me that she thought it was wrong and doubting going. Whereas, Pink and Purple kept saying “why would we invite you thats awkward” and i said i dont expect an invite or want one, i just think its weird. They then proceeded to say that it really isnt that deep, i cant control who they go out with, im embarrassing and to get over it. I genuinely genuinely sent a nice message and was talking in a nice way. I just thought they would care about my feelings but clearly they care about hanging out with boys more. Ever since then, they kept hanging out, they didnt care at all. But they made a NEW groupchat without yellow in it just because she apologised to me. Proves my point about the boys. They knew she wouldn't go anymore but it was extremely rude (she is closer to them than me!) it speaks volumes. This continues but last saturday, We were all at a party of a mutual friend. Blue walks up to me saying he wants to squash the “beef”, i walk away. An hour later he comes back when im drvnk, i hear him out and he apologises and says “i miss you, im sorry i know im in the wrong, i just prioritised orange, and i shouldve been there for you too” i say thank you for the apology, and he says “Can you be cool with purple too?” I definitely can not. Purple was the worst of them all, her treatment to me was horrible. and she continuously flirted with my ex when we dated. (i actually posted about purple on 7cups asking for advice in February 2023!) Either way, i was civil and we had some chat. I also talked to my ex and finally explained myself and we are on good terms. He is the only person i trust, so i told him everything that they have done. He told me that he said it was too soon to hangout, and that he thinks its weird too and doesn't know why yellow was removed (me him yellow and blue used to hangout back in early 2022 as friends) I explained and told him that they’re genuinely bad people but he was saying that he felt like they cared and theyre his only social life. this upsets me so much because they dont deserve orange!!!! When i dated orange they used to *** talk him and call him fat (he wasnt). He knows this but doesn't care and it just annoys me so bad. Do i accept blues apology? What do i do about this if anything! It bothers me so much and i feel guilty over yellow being kicked out. Am i the ***!?
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Is this jealousy issues? (please read 💗)
Relationship Stress / by exuberantBlueberry2488
Last post
 May 28th, 2023
...See more before i do start im sorry its a bit long So all the way to the start of the relationship. I have this friend. lets call her maria. (june 2022) When i first started dating my close guyfriend, (that i still date) Maria questioned this alot. She often called my boyfriend unattractive and fat. (she definitely didnt like him at this stage) moving on, when we changed timetables for new classes, Maria was in alot of my boyfriends classes, which resulted in them being friends. I didnt mind this at all at first. i thought it was good since they didnt get along before but eventually it turned into more (in my eyes). When i was walking with them (october 2022) i know its silly but my boyfriend was laughing about how small Marias hands are. This really got me overthinking and i know its overdramatic. I am in 3 of their classes and in all of them id see them talking and laughing. (they sit near to eachother while im on the opposite side) Fast forward abit and now its January 2023. We had this groupchat with us three and a few other friends, and Maria sent a few pictures of her cooking (cakes and stuff like that that she sells) and my boyfriend literally said quote by quote “i want to come over you look really good at cooking”. This really made me annoyed and i talked to him about it saying its not funny and he just said he was trying to *** me off. She has sent him many bad photos of me. She always takes photos of me and sends them to him (embarrassing ones from ages ago and current ones) and always makes fun of me infront of him. (she still does this and always embarrasses me) From January to now, theyve still been talking in every class, and my boyfriends friends tell me she waits for him after his classes sometimes. Also everytime i try talking to him she butts in, making useless conversion that weve talked about before. She also always makes gagging noises when people talk about us both being cute. She also uses all my inside jokes with him. This Monday Maria got a new nose peircing and my boyfriend noticed 3 days after and went “oh nose piercing nice” and then she replied going “well i got it ages ago but thanks for the compliment” and started pushing him around right infront of me. Obviously my boyfriend gave me a side eye because he knows shes being a bit weird. honestly i know he likes the attention and isnt really doing anything to stop it. ive talked to him about it before but he just agrees with me and laughs it off. i honestly really didn’t mind them being friends but she is obviously flirting. he doesnt really flirt back except for that one time in january but its still annoying. what do i do without seeming controlling?
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We like eachother but its boring..? 🤷‍♀️
Relationship Stress / by exuberantBlueberry2488
Last post
 April 6th, 2023
...See more Hi thank you for reading. So basically , Over the phone or text we are so energetic with eachother and keep laughing. when we are together in real life it felt boring. Like it obviously had elements of fun but we are no where near as fun and close as we are over the phone. what could we do to fix it . We were best friends and had alot of fun together before we started dating but now its so different. i dont know whats wrong
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Am i manipulative? (please reply and help) 💗
Relationship Stress / by exuberantBlueberry2488
Last post
 March 21st, 2023
...See more Please only honest opinions I was dating this guy and he has told me i am manipulative. However these were NEVER my intentions and i feel really bad about myself. I will explain the situation where he has thought im being manipulative in a second. But when he told me i was always manipulative i asked him for an example and he told me to have common sense and that he doesn't remember everything vividly. The first situation i was manipulative in was when he labelled me a bad gf and it hurt me so i sent him a paragraph like explaining myself and telling him how much i loved him and in it i put "and im sorry im a bad gf" and then he was like "well thats quite manipulative" and i apologised and made it clear it was never my intention. The second situation is when the breakup happened. I was in tears and wasnt really thinking. i practically begged him to stay, i told him " no but i think we could make it work, why are you giving up?" and he hesitated for a while and i didnt like the idea of forcing the relationship so i followed up my texts with "its fine" and he told me it was manipulation and that its *** up i did that. in his defence it does look manipulative but, over text not everything sounds as sincere as it is, and i promise i genuinely have never wanted to manipulate him.
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Am i manipulative?
Relationship Stress / by exuberantBlueberry2488
Last post
 March 27th, 2023
...See more I dated this guy called aaron. we are currently ex’s but still like eachother. Everytime we get into an argument which involves our feelings he brings up the fact im manipulative. This has honesty made me doubt myself alot and i feel horrible about it as it was never my intention to manipulate. Basically at one stage we didnt go out the whole month and he called me a sh— gf and it hurt me. after bottling up for 2 days i sent him a paragraph about the situation and included “im sorry for being a *** gf”. and he mentioned it was a bit manipulative. The second situation was when we were breaking up. I was in tears and wasnt really thinking about what i was saying. He told me he doesnt think its going to work and the arguments are just too much. i practically begged him to try make it work (alot of regret but i wasnt thinking) and he was very hesitant about this. (left me on opened for 3 minutes) so i responded “its fine”. And he told me that this was manipulation. i see his point of veiw on how it could be manipulative but i just didnt want to force the relationship. Now he is telling me it wasnt those 2 times i was manipulative. it was all the time. i asked for an example and he told me to have some common sense and that he cant remember everything. I promise i had no intention of manipulating him and i feel horrible about it. please help
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