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fvs222
113 M Embraced 1
PathStep 12 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2022 Member sinceJuly 3, 2022
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it hurts
LGBTQ+ / MOGII Support / by fvs222
Last post
 July 6th, 2022
...See more Hi! My name is Ajax and i'm a nonbinary person.i dont have anyone to talk to about this so i thought i could write about it here:) I've only come out to one person who is my best friend. He is a trans man himself but apparently my gender identity is a joke to him. Anytime I try to talk about it he changes the topic or ignores me, but when he starts going on about his pain i have to listen or i am a bad person. He shows very clearly with his actions that he views me as a girl who is just pretending as if she is oppressed in any way. I think to him only his pain matters and maybe he sees my gender issues as a threat?? that maybe he is not the only trans person in our family and that not only he is going through a lot? i only go by they/them and i've told him about it but anytime we hang out he uses she/her only. i've never heard him use they/them for me. it hurts a lot especially since i cant come out to anyone else that im close with, he is also my only friend. i wish he saw me as an actual trans person but based on what he told me i think to him the only valid trans people are the binary ones. i am uncomfortable in his presence, im scared to use the right pronouns for myself or talk about my issues. even though im apart of a group who is having their existence denied by transphobes im not a trans person apparently. to him they can just say that he is a woman but to me it is that but also that nonbinary people dont exist and there are only 2 genders. it makes my heart hurt that i cannot be myself around anyone because they remind me that i am a mistake. sorry if this post sounds unnecessary or if i said something bad but im in a lot of pain right now :(
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