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greenShade8584
1 89 M Embraced
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts6 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2025 Member sinceJune 1, 2022
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Confusing slow fade?
Relationship Stress / by greenShade8584
Last post
 June 25th, 2022
...See more I’m new to the dating scene after being in a horrible marriage for 20 years. I never thought I would be interested in anyone but someone attracted me and we were kind of hanging out for the past 5 to 6 months. He made it very clear he is emotionally disconnected and protective of his non committed lifestyle. This is okay with me since I actually live in another country and was here temporarily. I am not looking for deep commitment either at this point in my life. He was hot and cold over the months, saying he had to work on himself, overwhelmed with work etc but always would eventually reach out and things would be all good. Just recently when I thought we understood each other and we were in a good place, he has abruptly gone cold. I asked him about it and he said “yes, I have gone cold, and yes, I have pushed you away, I need to work on me and my to do list.” It was a very abrupt change in him. He is not responding to my messages at all. I know he is going through some stressful stuff suddenly, financially, job security, housing, etc. Also, I recently interviewed for a new job, a career changer & got the position, which takes me to another city, but I have the ability to travel freely so can visit often. At the same time my narcissistic ex who tries to sabotage anything that brings me joy I think tried contacting this man covertly pretending to be a new client but then sent messages calling him a “coward”. I am not 100% sure this was my ex but I cannot help but feel this sabotaged my new relationship. I am confused and totally in my head about possible reasons why things are so cold. Not sure if the door is closed or he just needs time and space. The story I tell myself is he is no longer interested and has stronger chemistry with someone else right now. I don’t have time to wait it out as I will be leaving for training soon. I allowed myself to be vulnerable and am now completely heartbroken. What do you think…did he run for the hills or is it salvageable?
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