harris900 Member Profile

...See more Greetings and bare with me. Please read if you can. I really appreciate it. My ex girlfriend as of 3 weeks ago is not talking to me right now. For months and months I had been delaying the commitment she wanted. Which put her through high stress at times. She was/is obsessed with me. We are both very much in love with each other. I didn't understand the toll it took until recently. Well I finally asked her to be with me two months ago but thats when things got choppy. I believe I overcompensated for waiting so long and ended up pushing her away. She has a lot goung on right now (new job, new apt, new schooling, etc). I don't think I handled it well and came off unsupportive. I was too focused trying to focus on me and her stuff while she was busy with life. I was used to spending so much time with her and then almost overnight she gets really busy. I dont htink I handled the transition in her life well. I became overbearing, clingy, needy, etc. But that has not been the bulk of our relationship. She expressed that she is very hurt and things have built up. She said she was trying to commit for months and now I have made the mental shift to commit and im coming off pushy. Our break up was over the course of two days. Saturday great (some things were shaky between us but not too bad). Sunday I ask her to come over she says yes, but then says she cant because she had more work than she thought. I cop an attitude frankly. I ask her if she could make more time but i made the dumb ass assumption she was letting her work pile up without even checking in. Argument continues, I invalidate her feelings to get back to the "point". She is definitely upset at this point. I suggest to see her and she isnt thrilled when I arrive. We talk and she says she doesnt know how to make herself happy and wants to learn how to do that. I was insisting things could work but she said she wasnt in a progressive mindset and that she was angry and hurt. Emotionally tapped. An idea of a break vs a break up surfaced. We seemed receptive and she would come over one last time and we wouldnt see each other for a while but perhaps check in weekly. She comes over things are fine and then when we get ready to leave my house so she can drive me to my car, she starts crying and says she cant do a break because then her healing wouldnt be about her (Monday). I insist a bit but then she asks me to respect her decision. I say alright I respect your decision. She tells me she is very much in love with me still and she still means all of what was said in the past. We pack up and shes driving me to my car which is at her house, we kiss on and off, prompting each other, I told her she could meet my mom (I had been delaying), she says "if youre comfortable with that" I say by that time this is resolved I better be and she gives a real genuine smile, we even bring up long term ideas weve discussed before, we bring up things we know we need to work on as individuals, and before I walked my car a trip was even mentioned as a possibility after all of this. Seemed fine. We even exchange the phrase "see you soon" understanding there was no deadline. Someone puts in my head to reach out to her a week in and i ask for clarification on our communication "do you want to continue like this past week or chat every now and then?" and she said not to text again. I understood she needed space but that reaction seems like a full contridiction. Do you think she will give me a second chance after some time has passed? The issues I believe with myself are fixable I have been doing true self development, going to therapy, realizing my downfalls. I know i cant say hey Ive improved! I wont beg or insist like i had prior. I want to respect her space. I just wish we could talk to clarify where we stand. But im sure that anxiety has pushed her away in the recent months. I had no reason to get anxious, the woman is in love with me, but I found a way to get moody asf anyway. After all of her waiting, I guess its time for me to wait If you think theres a chance, whats an eta for how long shell need? im not insterested in dating others even if this time is uncertain. I dont want to mess up things if this is the girl I am in love with and want to take seriously despite her upsetness right now. Im just not used to not talking at all but it may be best for now

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