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intuitiveSpring9885
63 M Embraced
PathStep 2 Compassion hearts5 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2023 Member sinceMarch 20, 2023
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Vent FWB
Relationship Stress / by intuitiveSpring9885
Last post
 March 21st, 2023
...See more Hello! This is a long rant but I just had to get it off my chest.... I've been friends wizh this guy for over 6 years and while we always had a *vibe* nothing ever happend between us (due to relationships, breakups, dating) until about a year ago. We had been fliting over texts and it started to turn more suggestive over time until we ended up sleeping together. That started a whole back-and-forth thing of us saying we just want to be friends and going back to having sex. It was always him ending things because he wanted to date and find someone to be on a relationship with. He was always very open and honest about it and about the fact that he can't picture being in a relationship with me and that he doesn't have any feelings for me. While I wasn't looking to date anyone I agreed that a relationship wasn't happening for us and I was fine with the whole situation. Back in September I started doubting whether I want to continue it though because I wasn't 100% sure about my feelings anymore. Also it kind of started to bother me that he woild break things off knowing I'd be still there waiting for him if it didn't work out for him. I ended up continuing it with him. He truly is my best friend and I feel extremely comfortable with him. But then he started 'changing the game' and started treating me more like his girlfriend than a friend he occasionally has sex with. He moved away to a city about two hours away from where I live and I aas really expecting things to quickly dwindle down to a casual friendship. That didn't happen, but instead we see each otjer about every other weekend. And if course this time we spend together is much more intimate and intense since we're staying with the other person for a few days instead of just hanging out for a few hours. But also he would initiate cuddling, randomly kiss me, hold me, take me to his parent's place, talk about how they like me better than his ex, talk about us going on vacation together. But he kept on insisting that he doesn't want it to be more. He was just with me this past weekend for my birthday. Already on Friday he told me that he really wanted to get back into dating and that he had an interesting match on a dating app. Today he texted me saying that he really wanted to hook up with a girl again that he used to date. He then asked me if it bothered me that he talks about this with me and I really prefer to know than to be left in the dark. This then started a whole conversation on where we are, what we're feeling and where this all is going. I ended up telling him that I could picture us trying the relationship thing and seeing where it goes. It was of course bad timing because of what he said over the course of the past few days about fantasizing being with other women. But I felt like I still should be honest. I didn't expect him to have changed his mind and want to try but I really don't understand him. He said that he can picture us being in a relationship and that it work out but that he just doesn't have any romantic feelings for me and that he thinks those are necessary for a relationship. I agree, but how can he then say he can see us being together?
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