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jessie06
274 M Embraced 2
PathStep 6 Compassion hearts21 Forum posts10 Forum upvotes11 Current upvotes11 Age GroupAdult Last activeMay, 2022 Member sinceOctober 2, 2018
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Loss of my grandma
Grief & Loss / by jessie06
Last post
 September 29th, 2022
...See more on 2/16/22, my grandma died. Thankfully, I was able to travel back home and be with her when she took her last breath (she was on home hospice and went peacefully in her sleep after a quick decline). She was my favorite person in the whole world. She was my babysitter when I was young, she drove me to school when needed, she cooked for me and loved going out to dinner for one on one time. It was really tough on her (and me) when I moved away for work, but thankfully she was able to be at and participate in my wedding in August. That was the best gift I could have asked for. Losing her has been hard, but in a weird way. I was there when she died and my heart knows she is gone, but my brain won’t allow me to process it. I did have a big breakdown on the month anniversary of her passing and I have noticed that since she died, I have definitely been a lot less motivated than normal and something just feels off. I’m 100% in a subtle stage of depression, and I’m scared that I don’t know when it will end. Her birthday is on 3/29, and I Know that will be hard for me. I know grief if different for everyone, but I have this emptiness in my soul that is tearing me apart mentally and emotionally. I just miss her so much, but I know she is at piece and with my grandpa again, so that is giving me some much needed comfort. thank you for letting my ramble on. I needed to get that off my chest and felt this was a safe place to do that.
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Maybe BDD?
OCD & Related Behaviors / by jessie06
Last post
 September 28th, 2021
...See more Hi... so for as long as I can remember, I have always had problems with how my body looked (specifically my stomach). I remember in elementary school I would look in the mirror and tell my mom, “my stomach looks big”. She, being the great mom (and possible Dysmorphic) she is, she always told me I didn’t have a big stomach. I’ve never stopped eating or restricted my food intake, but recently I feel I have been paying more attention to what I eat and I feel guilty after I eat. I’m also constantly checking how I look in the mirror and stepping on a scale, especially after I eat. I’ve also became really fixated on doing ab workouts and stuff like that. For some reason, it’s been really bad these last couple weeks. Like effecting my mental health bad. And it doesn’t help that I’m a stress eater, which only makes my mentality worse. Does anyone else experience this? Does this sound like BDD? I haven’t been clinically diagnosed, but it feels like this is what I’m experiencing. I just need assistance with how to fight through this.
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Eating disorder or body dysmorphia?
Eating Disorder Support / by jessie06
Last post
 August 17th, 2021
...See more I’ve always had body image issues. I believe in elementary school I remember looking in the mirror and telling my mom “look, my belly sticks out”, which it didn’t. Fast forward to now. I am 25 years old and find myself constantly stepping on a scale and looking at myself in the mirror from all angles. I don’t restrict my eating (I eat every meal, snack) but after I put anything in my system, I run to the bathroom, step on the scale, and check out my body. I do this multiple times a day and it’s gotten worse this past month. For some perspective, I am 5’4” and recently my weight has ranged from 115-117lbs. I don’t really fit into the description of the main eating disorders (I don’t avoid food, I don’t purge, I don’t binge), but I feel this obsession isn’t right. Do I have some type of eating disorder? Or is this body dysmorphia?
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Is he right to treat me this way?
Relationship Stress / by jessie06
Last post
 July 12th, 2019
...See more I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years. We were great, but when I moved back home for grad school in December 2017 things got bad. I thought it was because of the distance. Then he moved in with my family and I for grad school last year. Things were going great until I got a full-time job. Now everything is my fault because of my job. He is constantly comparing himself to me. If I get busy at work it
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