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kindahere
162 M Embraced 1
PathStep 5 Compassion hearts10 Forum posts10 Forum upvotes9 Current upvotes9 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2020 Member sinceJuly 13, 2017
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No Motivation for Classwork (college edition)
Depression Support / by kindahere
Last post
 May 25th, 2019
...See more Hey all. I made a thread back in November 2018 about my lack of motivation for college and more or less... I got worse. I dont care about my papers that I need to write. I literally dont care enough anymore and thats whats terrifying. Before, my problem was that I cared but I was willing to wait until the last minute to do it because I didnt care enough. Last minute as in submitting the paper fifteen minutes before it was due and pulling an all-nighter for it. Now, Ive completely just watched the deadline come and go without submitting my paper because I didnt do it. Ive written one email to a professor and explained I have poor time management right now and she was kind about it. A day has gone by and I made progress but I didnt finish it enough. I will be knocked down another letter grade. I have another assignment I completely havent done which is around 200 words. I also have a 700 word paper coming up due in a day... and Im just mostly staring blankly at nothing. My concentration for these papers are next to none. What I think is that Ive completely stopped caring because its dumb to do it if it doesnt feel like a real challenge. Sure its hard and boring but I can still pull something out of my butt in a handful of hours and get an A. Like whats the point of putting real effort if Im gonna get an A either way? The only real challenge I have right now is my artwork because Im an illustrator; I dont mind doing that.
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Lack of Motivation for College
Depression Support / by kindahere
Last post
 November 26th, 2018
...See more Hi all. The past semester has been rough, but the past couple weeks have been harder. Right now I'm staring at a 4-8 page paper (naturally it's gonna barely make 4 pages) that's due tomorrow to which I haven't started it. It's problematic for the obvious, but what makes it worse is that I do genuinely have always strived for As/to do well so there is a slight anxiety inducing thing there saying "I have to do this". I don't think it helps that almost every time I wait until the last minute to do things I don't want to that I end up doing well anyway. Except... the more I look at this paper, the more I write this, the more I don't know if I'm actually going to do it, and the more I wanna sink into my sofa and not move. A thing that is confusing is that I have all of the motivation to do my coursework pertaining to my major itself. I'm an illustrator/art major. I can sit there for hours just working on my stuff, but my gen eds are killing me. I try to find a sense of passion for what I'm learning in my other classes, but when it comes down to paperwork like this and anything else that isn't the lecture tbh I just... have no motivation. I've been going to group therapy for stress once a week for awhile now, but, I don't know, it's more of a skills class to which I've learned some stuff but most of it I have learned by googling haha. I think I'm in the right thread, as I just did a depression test and I got mild depression as possibility online... but... yeah... I dunno what to do. I also have other group projects/group papers coming up due soon and I feel awful because for once my group members are carrying me instead of me having to pull the heavy weight.
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