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ktfit419
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PathStep 1 Compassion hearts11 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes3 Current upvotes3 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2022 Member sinceAugust 1, 2022
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Anxiety of other things making sexual trauma worse
Trauma Support / by ktfit419
Last post
 August 1st, 2022
...See more In 2019 I was a freshman in college. My dorm was in the baseball player hall, my roomate and I were 1/2 dorms girls…. the rest was the freshman on the baseball team. One one of the players messaged me and asked if he could come hang out, he was cute (at the time) and this was the first guy that was interested in me at school. When he got to my dorm, (which he only lived two doors across from us) he seemed so nice. he asked me all the typical questions, “How was your day.” “any special thing happen,” and “you look so gorgeous.” he was talking to me like he actually wanted to be there, like he cared what i was telling him. he seemed so interested, i mean he played the part really well. the best. then he kissed me, and it all went down hill from there… no details will be shared, but it was rough and left me w a fractured cheek bone and broken nose. not many things to say about that except. TRAUMA. that one day altered the course of my life. months leading after that were rough and i tried to commit suicide. i couldn’t keep living like that, with my mind racing a million miles an hour. thinking every guy was going to be like him. cold. i finally got some PTSD therapy and taking anxiety medication. well over the years i have noticed that if i have a stressor in my life or something traumatic is happening my brain recalls that night. step by step. like anything bad is a trigger(i hate that word, but it’s true.) i have nightmares of his breath and smell. if anyone knows coping mechanisms or advice on how stop letting this fear take over my life. i know ill never be able to forget, but over these years i’ve tried my best to manage.
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