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laumarie6
3,706 M Seeking Light 3
PathStep 64 Compassion hearts283 Forum posts18 Forum upvotes21 Current upvotes21 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2024 Member sinceMarch 9, 2023
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Not wanting to be home *content warning, self-harm*
Anxiety Support / by laumarie6
Last post
 October 26th, 2023
...See more I got home from work about an hour ago but I stayed in the car not wanting to go inside. I've had several anxiety attacks today and, when I was driving home, I started to self-harm. I don't do it that often anymore, so when it happens, it scares me. My boyfriend is waiting for me, I told him I would be home late, he hasn't seen my car yet (I didn't park so close), and I don't wanna go inside because I don't want to get him down, specially because tomorrow it's his birthday. He does so much for me... I don't want to be a burden and I don't want to worry him with me self-harming again. I wanna be better for me, for him, for the people who truly care about me... But I just don't know how, I can't seem to make it happen, and when I think I'm starting to come out the dark place, something pushes me back inside.
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Anxiety attacks at work and friendship problems
Anxiety Support / by laumarie6
Last post
 October 26th, 2023
...See more I had a little fight with my best friend, who also works with me, in the office, so we haven't been able to really talk. This gave me an anxiety attack, because even though I think we both made mistakes, I also think I could've been more understanding. I sent her a text explaining my reaction to what she said to me and I apologized; I told her that I knew it wasn't about "because she did it to me, I'm going to do it to her too", that I knew she had had a rough night the day before, that I would never do anything to hurt her on purpose, and I knew that she wouldn't do it to me either... I also said I was going to be more careful in the future... She didn't reply and afterward, she said she was still angry with me. I love her and I really don't know what to do. I don't think this will ruin our friendship, of course, but it hurts me to know that we wronged each other. Do you have any advice?
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I matter, just not as much...
Depression Support / by laumarie6
Last post
 May 15th, 2023
...See more I've come to realize that, no matter how bad I feel, no matter how much I prioritize other people and their needs because I love them, they won't put me first everytime it counts... They might be better without me...
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