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limeCherry7381
381 M Embraced 3
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts13 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2019 Member sinceDecember 1, 2017
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New to this...here goes.
Newbie Hub / by limeCherry7381
Last post
 September 4th, 2019
...See more Hi, new member here. So this might be a bit of long winded one. So I'm a 32 year old English guy. I live in Iceland where I now have a boyfriend(he's also English but he's been living here for 10 years). I came here on a vacation in January and loved it. We met back then and initially we were just friendly. He mentioned that he had a room available in his apartment that was really cheap. I flew back from my vacation, messaged and spoke to him for a few weeks online and decided I to take the room! I've always wanted to live and work in Iceland, it's an amazing place and this was my chance. So, I booked my ticket and flew back out at the start of March. I got a job downtown working in a store, nothing fancy, certainly not my dream job but with my rent being so cheap I'm still saving a decent amount of money. Since being here, one thing has led to another and now we are kind of in a relationship. I say kind of because we haven't made it official...but you have that feeling...you know what I mean.. like we spend A LOT of time together and if either of us tried to hook up with somebody else it absolutely would not be cool. He's a lovely guy, knows about my long term struggle with depression is very accomodating and patient about it, putting up with all of my bullshit in a way that most guys probably wouldn't. But here's the thing, I didn't come out properly until very late(25), and im finally getting to a point where I'm not hiding my sexuality from anybody and I'm relatively(athough not completely) comfortable with it, and expressing who I am. Now that I'm actually at that point, there's a big part of me that wants to experiment with it, have fun, and even just fool around. I guess im kind of at a point now that a lot of guys 10 years younger than me would typically be at. The thing is, he is the same age as me, and wants to settle down and just be with one person. I do care for him, a lot, and the thought of him not being in my life makes me feel kind of sad, but there is really a big part of me that just wants to goout and go wild. This may sound selfish but this is how I feel...but still, he's a big part of my life here in a new country, I mean...he got me set up here. I moved here(to Iceland) and he was my only contact, all of my friends that I have made here have been through him, so it's kind of difficult to confide in anybody else. Do I confide in him? Do I focus on the positives that what I have? I'm also not THAT young anymore, I want to start doing things for me whilst I still can. I don't want to look back and regret this time in my life. This is a long first post I know, but what the hell I'm going to put it out there. Let me know your thoughts! Much appreciated.
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