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littleStrawberries1840
1 2,548 M Hopeful Heart 5
PathStep 8 Compassion hearts269 Forum posts75 Forum upvotes198 Current upvotes198 Age GroupTeen Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceAugust 25, 2023
Bio

Struggling but working on it




Recent forum posts
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Old Habits Die Hard (TW: SH)
General Support / by littleStrawberries1840
Last post
 January 13th
...See more I just stumbled on some old pictures from last year. Old pictures of my arm with cuts. It's not as bad as you might imagine, maybe two thin ones and a thick one, only about an inch long, but it still stopped me in my tracks. I stared at it for a bit before turning to my scars, the skin dark but healed, and I couldn't help but wonder why I'd stopped. I wondered how it'd feel to let myself start to slip again and pick up the SH tool and press it into my skin. It's kind of funny, how my pain tolerance is too low for me to inflict any real damage, but it still felt relieving. It made me feel lonely. It made me remember how lonely I used to feel, even surrounded by my friends. I'm happier now, I would say, but still. I have moments where I feel like my old self, but they tend to fade. I wonder how it'd feel to just let it happen again.
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Feeling replaceable
General Support / by littleStrawberries1840
Last post
 July 12th, 2025
...See more I feel like I’m not special. I’m not unique in any way. I feel like any and all of my friends can and will replace me. Maybe this is the trauma of being dropped by an entire friend group with the snap of a fingers or just some sort of complex, but I look at my friends, and all I can see is how much happier they’d be if I wasn’t there. How much they’d all click if I took a step back and tried not to be so present. How much their traits add up to mine to the point where I’m not needed. I watch as they talk and laugh and mingle, standing wistfully in the background, wishing to join in. But I just don’t fit. My laugh is too loud, my jokes not funny. I try to hard to be liked, therefore losing all their attention. It’s so much easier to like anyone else besides me. Why not just pick a whole new person instead?
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