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loyalWheel6322
45 18,614 M Progress Road 7
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts236 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes0 Current upvotes0 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2026 Member sinceAugust 5, 2026
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Long distance
Relationship Stress / by loyalWheel6322
Last post
 August 7th
...See more I can’t handle myself anymore, and this situation is really tormenting me. Please look at it objectively and honestly tell me what you think. So, I met him about three weeks ago. He’s 27 and I’m 20. We met at a wedding, where he asked for my number by handing me a little piece of paper. From that day on, we saw each other every single day. He already knew that I study in the United States. Every day he took me out somewhere. We watched a movie at his place, kissed, cuddled, and he told me he felt really good with me. Then, during that movie night, I asked him how he saw everything between us. He gave me two options. The first was that we keep seeing each other, but he thought the feelings might fade during the five months we’d be apart. The second was that we stop talking because he believed that would be the best option. He gave examples of couples who didn’t make long-distance work, including his own parents—his father went to Germany for work, met someone else, and they eventually divorced. I asked him how much he thought he would miss me. He said somewhere between “I don’t care at all” and “I’ll miss you a little.” The next day we went to a local festival, he got drunk, and he opened up several times. He admitted that he had said “somewhere in the middle” only because he was trying to convince himself of that. In reality, he wanted to give us a chance. We even joked and talked about getting married someday. He said he’d like us to live together and asked me whether I’d want children. We agreed that we’d try to make the relationship work. He also set boundaries, saying there shouldn’t be anyone else involved. I asked whether we’d at least stay friends if things didn’t work out, and he said, “I don’t have female friends, only acquaintances.” The next day we didn’t really talk about long distance anymore. Before I left for America, I went to the Croatian coast. He drove seven hours, rented an apartment just so we could spend time together before I left. During that visit he never brought up long distance again. When we said goodbye, he first said, “Don’t mess around,” then corrected himself and said, “I mean, don’t let other guys mess with you.” He wished me a safe trip, and that was it. After I arrived in America, he texted me three days later asking if I’d arrived safely, and we talked a bit. His communication already felt much more reserved. Then we had a video call that didn’t go well at all. For the first 20 minutes he was driving and didn’t really look at me. After he got home, he was ironing clothes during the call. In a 55-minute conversation, he looked directly at me maybe once. I asked him how he was surviving without me, and he replied, “I survived 27 years before you, and I’ll survive now too.” He commented on the social gatherings I go to and said, “The difference is that when you go, it’s mostly guys there.” I asked if that bothered him, and he answered, “Who am I to tell you anything? You’re 20, you’re in America—go live your life.” I asked if that meant he was telling me to move on from him, and he said, “Interpret it however you want.” He also told me he’d talked to his friends about me inviting him to America. He said all of them except one—and except me—thought the idea was crazy, and that we were living in a movie. He also said he didn’t want me to keep pushing him to come because he’d already explained his reasons. He told me I was very ungrateful and didn’t appreciate everything he had done for me. I asked what I should have done differently, and he simply said, “It’s over now.” Later we talked about a book I’d recommended. I told him it was about a man who dies and whose wife eventually finds new love. He sarcastically said, “Great.” I asked what she was supposed to do, and he replied, “Well, if something happened to me, you’d immediately find someone else.” Later I mentioned that he’d gotten me hooked on playing online card games, and he replied, “Better play cards than go out with other guys.” Toward the end of the conversation, we talked about how outgoing people are here and how some guys had approached me, but I told him I’d turned them down. Shortly afterward he said, “My brother is calling me, I have to go.” Since that 55-minute call, neither of us has contacted the other for 10 days. Based only on these facts, what do you honestly think is going on in his mind? What do you think he is feeling? Please give me your most objective conclusion and help me understand how to cope with this situation. Napravi summery najbitnijeg sazmi
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Long distance
Depression Support / by loyalWheel6322
Last post
 August 6th
...See more I can’t handle myself anymore, and this situation is really tormenting me. Please look at it objectively and honestly tell me what you think. So, I met him about three weeks ago. He’s 27 and I’m 20. We met at a wedding, where he asked for my number by handing me a little piece of paper. From that day on, we saw each other every single day. He already knew that I study in the United States. Every day he took me out somewhere. We watched a movie at his place, kissed, cuddled, and he told me he felt really good with me. Then, during that movie night, I asked him how he saw everything between us. He gave me two options. The first was that we keep seeing each other, but he thought the feelings might fade during the five months we’d be apart. The second was that we stop talking because he believed that would be the best option. He gave examples of couples who didn’t make long-distance work, including his own parents—his father went to Germany for work, met someone else, and they eventually divorced. I asked him how much he thought he would miss me. He said somewhere between “I don’t care at all” and “I’ll miss you a little.” The next day we went to a local festival, he got drunk, and he opened up several times. He admitted that he had said “somewhere in the middle” only because he was trying to convince himself of that. In reality, he wanted to give us a chance. We even joked and talked about getting married someday. He said he’d like us to live together and asked me whether I’d want children. We agreed that we’d try to make the relationship work. He also set boundaries, saying there shouldn’t be anyone else involved. I asked whether we’d at least stay friends if things didn’t work out, and he said, “I don’t have female friends, only acquaintances.” The next day we didn’t really talk about long distance anymore. Before I left for America, I went to the Croatian coast. He drove seven hours, rented an apartment just so we could spend time together before I left. During that visit he never brought up long distance again. When we said goodbye, he first said, “Don’t mess around,” then corrected himself and said, “I mean, don’t let other guys mess with you.” He wished me a safe trip, and that was it. After I arrived in America, he texted me three days later asking if I’d arrived safely, and we talked a bit. His communication already felt much more reserved. Then we had a video call that didn’t go well at all. For the first 20 minutes he was driving and didn’t really look at me. After he got home, he was ironing clothes during the call. In a 55-minute conversation, he looked directly at me maybe once. I asked him how he was surviving without me, and he replied, “I survived 27 years before you, and I’ll survive now too.” He commented on the social gatherings I go to and said, “The difference is that when you go, it’s mostly guys there.” I asked if that bothered him, and he answered, “Who am I to tell you anything? You’re 20, you’re in America—go live your life.” I asked if that meant he was telling me to move on from him, and he said, “Interpret it however you want.” He also told me he’d talked to his friends about me inviting him to America. He said all of them except one—and except me—thought the idea was crazy, and that we were living in a movie. He also said he didn’t want me to keep pushing him to come because he’d already explained his reasons. He told me I was very ungrateful and didn’t appreciate everything he had done for me. I asked what I should have done differently, and he simply said, “It’s over now.” Later we talked about a book I’d recommended. I told him it was about a man who dies and whose wife eventually finds new love. He sarcastically said, “Great.” I asked what she was supposed to do, and he replied, “Well, if something happened to me, you’d immediately find someone else.” Later I mentioned that he’d gotten me hooked on playing online card games, and he replied, “Better play cards than go out with other guys.” Toward the end of the conversation, we talked about how outgoing people are here and how some guys had approached me, but I told him I’d turned them down. Shortly afterward he said, “My brother is calling me, I have to go.” Since that 55-minute call, neither of us has contacted the other for 10 days. Based only on these facts, what do you honestly think is going on in his mind? What do you think he is feeling? Please give me your most objective conclusion and help me understand how to cope with this situation.
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