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n4nv
1 1,174 M Little Steps 3
PathStep 11 Compassion hearts43 Forum posts7 Forum upvotes6 Current upvotes6 Age GroupAdult Last activeApril, 2025 Member sinceMarch 23, 2023
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Anxiety over breakup of friendship
Anxiety Support / by n4nv
Last post
 September 19th, 2023
...See more I'm having trouble understanding what happened to me and a girl that used to be my friend and I don't know how to move on from here. We were friends for 3 years, we were very close to each other, we lived together in more than one place and we had a music project together, but then she started to pick fights with me regularly and stop caring so much about me and I started to grew some resentment over time, so we were a bit shaky, but I was trying to keep my boundaries healthy and build good communication with her, even though it was not an easy task for me, I have always had trouble socializing and depression and anxiety. But then one day she was invited by a friend of ours to visit another friend but she got upset with them for what I thought was valid reasons but also maybe a bit overreaction on her side, because she told them to *** off, which they did, they left her alone, but then she got upset by being left alone by them and not being invited to go with them anymore. I understood both sides and told both sides what I thought of it and then decided to go anyway without her and tried not to give too much tough to it because it had nothing to do with me and I was trying to not get too involved in a situation that was not my responsibility. Some time after that, she hurt herself while I was sleeping and she tried to talk to me but I didn't understand what she was saying because I was kinda still sleeping and she wasn't being clear about what she was saying, she just mumbled something and went away very quickly and I went back to sleep, but a few minutes later she came back to my room, slammed the door and started shouting insults to me, so I got up and realized she was hurt and offered to take her to the hospital but she kept insulting me so I started having a panick attack and just went back to the room while my bf helped her. Later I told her that I was not ok with the way she screamed at me but she told me she did it because she felt ignored by me, I told her I couldn't be ignoring her because I was sleeping and not understanding anything that was happening, but she didn't seem to accept it entirely. So I was feeling really overwhelmed and I told her I needed some time away from her to think and process what I was feeling and she was ok with that. Then I went in the trip with my friends without her and she got jealous of that, so when I came back she said she needed to talk to me and she started saying really mean things about me, implying I was a fake friend and I just said anything other people wanted to hear and then talk bad about them in their backs, which is not true, and that I backed off when she needed support from me. Then she said I was being weak and overly sensitive for still being overwhelmed by her screaming at me, and also that I was not being present for her and was not being the friend I said I promised to be to her and then when I answered back she started yelling insults at me again and and said she regretted ever knowing me and that she never wanted to see me again and to never come back to her house or any place she was in, so I stoped talking to her at all, she even blocked me in social media, so I didn't know anything about her. 6 months later she sends me a message telling me how she stills thinks about me and how important I was to her and that she still sees me as her brother. I really don't know what to think about this. I feel really abused by her and manipulated but also l feel like I'm going crazy because sometimes I don't know what is real anymore, because my anxiety always makes everything worse. I just wish I could stop my brain from overworking sometimes.
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Feeling heartbroken by a friend
Relationship Stress / by n4nv
Last post
 September 20th, 2023
...See more I'm having trouble understanding what happened to me and a girl that used to be my friend and I don't know how to move on from here. We were friends for 3 years, we were very close to each other, we lived together in more than one place and we had a music project together, but then she started to pick fights with me regularly and stop caring so much about me and I started to grew some resentment over time, so we were a bit shaky, but I was trying to keep my boundaries healthy and build good communication with her, even though it was not an easy task for me, I have always had trouble socializing and depression and anxiety. But then one day she was invited by a friend of ours to visit another friend but she got upset with them for what I thought was valid reasons but also maybe a bit overreaction on her side, because she told them to *** off, which they did, they left her alone, but then she got upset by being left alone by them and not being invited to go with them anymore. I understood both sides and told both sides what I thought of it and then decided to go anyway without her and tried not to give too much tough to it because it had nothing to do with me and I was trying to not get too involved in a situation that was not my responsibility. Some time after that, she hurt herself while I was sleeping and she tried to talk to me but I didn't understand what she was saying because I was kinda still sleeping and she wasn't being clear about what she was saying, she just mumbled something and went away very quickly and I went back to sleep, but a few minutes later she came back to my room, slammed the door and started shouting insults to me, so I got up and realized she was hurt and offered to take her to the hospital but she kept insulting me so I started having a panick attack and just went back to the room while my bf helped her. Later I told her that I was not ok with the way she screamed at me but she told me she did it because she felt ignored by me, I told her I couldn't be ignoring her because I was sleeping and not understanding anything that was happening, but she didn't seem to accept it entirely. So I was feeling really overwhelmed and I told her I needed some time away from her to think and process what I was feeling and she was ok with that. Then I went in the trip with my friends without her and she got jealous of that, so when I came back she said she needed to talk to me and she started saying really mean things about me, implying I was a fake friend and I just said anything other people wanted to hear and then talk bad about them in their backs, which is not true, and that I backed off when she needed support from me. Then she said I was being weak and overly sensitive for still being overwhelmed by her screaming at me, and also that I was not being present for her and was not being the friend I said I promised to be to her and then when I answered back she started yelling insults at me again and said she regretted ever knowing me and that she never wanted to see me again and to never come back to her house or any place she was in, so I stoped talking to her at all, she even blocked me in social media, so I didn't know anything about her. 6 months later she sends me a message telling me how she stills thinks about me and how important I was to her and that she still sees me as her brother. I really don't know what to think about this. I feel really abused by her and manipulated but also I feel like I'm going crazy because sometimes I don't know what is real anymore. Can someone please give me a perspective?
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