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nutmeg4144
1 1,144 M Little Steps 3
PathStep 16 Compassion hearts83 Forum posts3 Forum upvotes9 Current upvotes9 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2026 Member sinceSeptember 5, 2025
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Relationship Guidance for Partner with Bipolar Disorder
Bipolar, Schizophrenia & Psychosis Support / by nutmeg4144
Last post
 February 5th
...See more Please tell me your opinions, advice, point of view, etc. on my situation. I'm looking for help and guidance. I am reaching out here for my boyfriend who was diagnosed with type 1 bipolar disorder in June 2025 at 42. We had only began dating in April 2025. We fell for each other fast and it became a serious relationship quickly. So mid June he went into complete psychosis. I helped him through it. Had to take him to the ER and inpatient psych hospital, and set up with a psychiatrist and attend all his medical appts. I work in healthcare and know a lot so I've basically been heavily involved in his medical care. I have lived with him since June (a few weeks before the psychosis). He sees a psychiatrist about once a month for medication management and hasn't really appeared to want to start therapy. I haven't pushed it too much bc I don't want him to refuse to go bc I keep bringing it up. We are still actively working on finding the ideal medication regimen that works for him. Got a medication DNA test for him and everything. I feel like I've been in this caregiver role while he is deep into depression and just does nothing but sleep and watch TV. Barely starts conversations with me, much less ever thinking about my needs. I've taken on more financial responsibility in the relationship than him, helping around the house, driving us places a lot, supporting him medically, and still working a full time job. He owns some businesses for income but currently other people are managing it, but with tariffs it's just not doing well currently. I kept my mouth shut since October after bringing a concern up once and he completely refused to respond. Recently, I've tried bringing these issues up several times bc I'm starting to become resentful in silence and I don't want to do that. However, he gets defensive and starts lashing out at me and making it all my fault for starting a fight. All I am doing is trying to let him know is how I'm feeling and work through it together. I'm exhausted and need help and for him to step up. But he makes it my fault. I feel like I'm being forced to make a decision between peace in the relationship with me unhappy or me respecting my self worth but losing the relationship. It's unfair. However, last night I came to the realization that he is more depressed than I really have stopped and realized. His whole world was turned upside down, and when I remind him of problems, he can't stand to hear about it. Even if I'm talking calmly and kindly about it. I went up to him and said "I'm sorry it felt like an attack, it was not my intention. However I think your depression is worse than I really realized. I will continue to be more patient if you promise to keep trying to feel better and get out of the depression." He teared up and nodded his head and hugged me. I am happy we worked through some of it, but I know this is a long road ahead. I really love and care about him and feel like he is the one I'm supposed to be with. However, I do not want to sacrifice my own well-being and I don't know how long it will take for him to be more present in the relationship. If anyone has some advice to help me communicate, understand, or improve the relationship, I would be grateful. Thank you all so much.
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