oleiolai Member Profile

...See more hello everyone, nice to meet you all. so i joined this community because, well, im depressed. ive been depressed for a very long time since a very young age, and im already young right now, so its been an almost nonstop struggle. i joined this site because i reached a point recently where i have had serious suicidal thoughts (on a lighter note, im taking steps to get professional help pertaining this) and a very long and intense depressive period. like i said, im still fairly young and i don't want to wait until my problem causes irreversible damage before i get help, though sadly i feel like (especially in my country) i will only be sent to a professional when i finally snap and ruin my life. im here because i want to learn how to keep afloat and deal with depression when you have no choice but to be a worker and constantly have to be able to churn out output after output. im in a very competitive school environment and i was kind of raised to be the "golden child" of the family but now im burning out so bad and honestly, when society no longer has a use for you, you're basically dirt under their feet. i have no choice though but to have to force myself to do all thats required of me even when its becoming harder and harder to even get out of bed. its also nice to be in a community because alot of times i get into my own head about how everyone else is probably doing fine and im just making problems for myself, its a bit comforting that im not alone in what im going through, thugh unfortunately its also sad how many others are facing this too. sorry this is such a downer, i hope this works out though, not just for me but for you guys too.

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