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onlyangel2003
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PathStep 1 Compassion hearts9 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2024 Member sinceJuly 20, 2022
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arguments caused by self-doubt
Relationship Stress / by onlyangel2003
Last post
 December 8th, 2024
...See more i’m having a lot of difficulties navigating my relationship because my emotions and insecurities are getting in the way. i’ve tried opening up to my partner about difficulties i’m having, but i always feel like they come across the wrong way. some of the time i will be annoyed at my partner due to not feeling as though my requests are being respected (e.g. it took them 3 months to stop tickling me after asking repeatedly for them to stop doing it because it hurt and i don’t like it, i know it may seem small but it’s one example). i don’t want them to feel like i’m constantly annoyed at them, because it’s mainly due to my overthinking, but when they do end up doing something, i feel like it upsets me more than what’s normal, and then it ends up causing an argument because i struggle to tell them straight away out of fear of them thinking i have a huge issue with them. as well as this, i want them to just understand that i’m upset about it without them becoming defensive about something they’ve done when it is them i’m upset at, but they just result it trying to defend themselves before supporting me. i also have a lot of grief i’m experiencing at the moment, alongside a lot of stress from university and friendship struggles, and i know this is effecting me. i have opened up to my partner about this, as well as negative feelings that have stemmed from previous relationships, like insecurities about my appearance and personality, and a fear of rejection or not being good enough. it always ends up in an argument and me crying which neither of us want. i think it’s mainly because they should be the person i can go to when i need to speak to someone, and i want to feel like i can speak to them about everything, but sometimes i don’t feel like that, and i feel a bit of a burden. i know how much my partner loves me, and they do a lot to make sure i know this. but i can’t help my negative thoughts, anxiety and overthinking getting in the way of truly believing it. i don’t know how to voice my feelings in a way that won’t make my partner feel bad or turn into an argument.
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