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onmywaytosomethingbigger
674 M Embraced 5
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts25 Forum posts4 Forum upvotes4 Current upvotes4 Age GroupAdult Last activeDecember, 2022 Member sinceMay 5, 2018
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TW : Violent or Harmful Fetishes?
Relationship Stress / by onmywaytosomethingbigger
Last post
 September 24th, 2018
...See more A friend and I both have a blood kink, however I have a lot of kinks relating to violence such as gunplay, bdsm, s&m, knifeplay, and more. It didn't used to be so troublesome, it was mostly just an extra kick I would add to fantasies to help to get myself off quicker, but they've gotten more violent. I've been having a reaccuring fantasy of being shot in the head as a form of sexual release. I've also started feeling less and less fulfilled with non-violent kink or non-kink related fantasies, to the point where I will cry or shake because I can't get the release I want without wanting pain. I've also struggled with self harm in the past and I don't want any of this to be a form of relapse or another form of self harm that i'm not conciously aware of. Does anyone have any advice or have any knowledge on anything like this?
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Hypersexuality in Teenagers?
Relationship Stress / by onmywaytosomethingbigger
Last post
 September 1st, 2024
...See more I am 14 years old and I have been masturbating since I was 9, though I have memories going back to the ages of 5 or 6 of engaging in self pleasure though i didn't exactly recognize it then. While if it was just semi-normal masturbation i wouldn't consider this weird or anything out of the ordinary, however it's been getting consuming. When i turned 11 I started doing it without noticing, almost uncontrollably. i'd accidentally masturbate in class or in cars or in front of other people. I tried to stop myself and it worked for around a year but it was also the worst year of my life emotionally and I turned to self harm. I began using mastubation again as a self harm alternative. I realized that i always thought of self harm as more of a sexual release rather than a purely emotional release. This led me to explore kinks and masochism and start reading up on pain and blood fetishes. Recently I've been discovering a lot about my relation between pain and sexuality and there have been nights were I will cry over the fact that some of my fantasies could literally get me killed. Sometimes I will crave sexual attention so much that I will accidentally try to get my friends to give it to me. I become slightly hostile and dominant towards my friends, especially ones who I know either like me, are very sexual, or I find attractive. After I sleep or calm down or find some way to stop needed sexual attention I'll feel bad for manipulating them or hurting them and I've never physically hurt anyone but I'm terrified that I might. Does anyone have any advice on this?
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