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peachcicada
199 M Embraced 1
PathStep 39 Compassion hearts8 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2022 Member sinceAugust 7, 2021
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he/him

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Bad at Friendships
Relationship Stress / by peachcicada
Last post
 October 31st, 2021
...See more Not even too sure why I’m really posting this right now, but I’m frustrated at how difficult it is for me to make and feel connected with anybody. I’ll admit that I’m really not in an optimal situation to be finding any friends in the first place, I have been extremely homebound agoraphobic for about 2 or 3 years now so the chances I get to even be around anyone besides my immediate family are completely nonexistent. But even prior to All This I have NEVER been able to form friendships no matter how hard I tried. I’ve had one friend since elementary school, and I had two friends in middle school, but my middle school friends have had rocky endings, and my childhood friend honestly doesn’t talk to me much at all anymore despite my efforts. I have ADHD (diagnosed late in life) and I realize that the only person I ever felt truly connected with was my ex (who one of the friends I had in middle school) and now with how my life is, I feel completely cornered. I can’t find anyone to socialize with, and even when I do I feel nothing from those acquaintanceships. My ex has ADHD too and I’m afraid that may have been part of the reason talking with her felt so normal. Everybody else that I’ve ever talked to has always just flet totally different than me, like we were just on different levels all the time, and it always ends up with me feeling extremely unfulfilled in my relationships. I’m sorry to make this so long, but I’m incredibly frustrated by it all. I miss the way having friends felt. I spend every single day all alone besides when I talk to my family, and I’m lucky to have my hobbies and whatnot because it is extremely isolating living life the way I am.
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