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powerfulPrune4490
767 M Little Steps
PathStep 1 Compassion hearts24 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes2 Current upvotes2 Age GroupAdult Last activeAugust, 2024 Member sinceAugust 8, 2024
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should i continue trying or just let him go?
Relationship Stress / by powerfulPrune4490
Last post
 August 19th, 2024
...See more so i’ve been in a relationship for about 7 months now, the first 4 months were great then we started fighting regularly and i thought it’s a normal thing since we are still teenagers. we love eachother alot and we are always planning to get married and stuff. after 4 months i found out that he was cheating ( texting another woman behind my back) and when i told him he kept telling me that he thought that i dont love him and we are gonna break up anyways. it hurt me really bad and i kept blaming myself because im not that kind of a person that shows too much affection and i know its a really bad problem but i was trying to fix this, we broke up but we would still text and fight and he always talked to me in a really bad way. he would constantly say hurtful things like “ its your fault” “ i wish i never loved you” even though he cheated and hurt me really bad to the point that i messed up my exams bec i couldn’t focus. i would beg him to get back together and fix everything but the answer was always “ i will think about it”, 2 months go by and everyday my heart breaks more then we met up and he told me that he wanted us to get back together and i agreed. the first month when we got back together was great he understood how much he hurt me and apologized alot but never explained his actions and said that “ there is no explanation for what i did i was just dumb”, i lost my trust in him ofc bec i cant even trust anyone and i did trust him but he broke that trust so it was really hard for me to trust him again. he was really angry about the fact that i dont trust him and he would shame me for that even though i told him its not my fault but in fact its his. at the beginning of our relationship we never had sex or kissed or anything but after we got back together we had sex and he would always tell me how he would never leave me and we should get married and that he loves me etc but deep down something inside me told me that it would end up the same. we got back at the same point again where we would always argue but this time he would say some hurtful stuff and would never admit that he was wrong. he once argued with me because i wanted to shower before i come over and to this day i dont even know what made him mad about that, he would argue if i went out with any of my friends even tho i went out with him everyday and almost all of my time was just for him. whenever i go out with someone that isnt him he would find a way to ruin the day for me and never apologize also. he would always say stuff while arguing like “ you’re crazy” “ i dont even wanna talk to you js ***” “ i wish we never got back together” “ all you do is argue” but i argue with him abt bad stuff that he did and i felt like if i didnt love him i would bother to argue. the last argument was that he joked abt *** my mother so i told him would be better with yours so he legit threatened to “ ruin my life” and he was being serious, i don’t usually joke like that but i felt disrespected so i replied in the same way and i dont think i was wrong and if i was wrong i dont think that he should threaten me in that way ( if he really does love me like he says”. i have depression so i barely show any happiness, it pisses him off alot and he always complains about it and i understand that it is tiring to have a partner that suffers with depression but he never even tried to talk to me about it or even offer help he would just call me crazy and shame me. yesterday he talk about it again and how hard is it for him to deal with someone that is barely happy about anything so i js told him i will try to be happy💀 today i had enough with him, i was having a panic attack and i need someone to talk to so i woke him up he asked me why i woke him up so i told him that i missed him and that i js wanted to talk even for 10 minutes. he told me how annoying i am and that he doesn’t wanna talk and that im crazy and stuff like that. i didnt even do anything wrong or say anything bad i just said i missed you so i felt so *** bad for myself and i dont know what to do we are supposed to get engaged next year and i really dont know how to fix this or what is the problem
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