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quietOrange5416
253 M Embraced 2
PathStep 19 Compassion hearts10 Forum posts2 Forum upvotes1 Current upvotes1 Age GroupAdult Last activeMarch, 2022 Member sinceJanuary 5, 2022
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Talking to boyfriends dad feels like talking to a wall
Relationship Stress / by quietOrange5416
Last post
 March 8th, 2022
...See more So title… a little back story: I have struggles with depression, anxiety, c-ptsd and other stuff.. recently I have suspected that I am Autistic because I’ve always felt different. Being direct with anyone is really easy for me, I don’t get embarrassed by things other people my be embarrassed about, I’ve been always been picky with things like example; the fork I use to eat needs to feel smooth and light because I hate how heavy forks feel. All the light switches need to be facing the same way when their on/off, I have a hard time keeping eye contact with people, I’m really good at pretending to act like everyone else or just act super confident. the list can go on. Anyway, I’ve started researching and reading more about autism and It got me thinking that I might be autistic. 2 occasions. 1st ; My boyfriends dad comes over on my birthday to say happy birthday and to tell me he’s raising out rent. We get to talking and I told him how it’s difficult for me to talk with men because of past trauma with men. I tell him vaguely (don’t wanna tell my whole life story) that my mind works differently than other people (based on all the things I’ve taken notice in my life) and he tell me that I just have a low self esteem and need to snap out of it. 2nd ; he comes over to confront me and ask me if there’s a problem between us. Because I wouldn’t hug him and my hugs are awkward (I’m latina and it’s “custom” to hug ppl when you greet them) I said no, i just don’t feel comfortable hugging men. We’re alone and he stand In front of me and says “I hope you don’t think imma hurt you” … as were alone in the house. And think to myself “did he really ask me that? I’m who’s right kind does this seem ok??” I’ve gotten to the point where just I don’t like him and when I see him it fills me with rage. I hate talking to him because it just feels like I’m talking to a wall. I tried to make convo with him and he says “we don’t have thing to talk about because we’re from different times” i tried talking about work and stuff that we can relate to but the convo never gets anywhere and he just turns and starts talking to my boyfriend about work and they’re talk on and on and on. it sucks because I know it means a lot to my boyfriend but I am at the point where I just don’t like interacting with his dad. his dad will TELL me that he appreciates me as part of the family but then SHOWS me completely different. i know he has his own trauma that he probably hasn’t healed yet… which I understand. I just hate talking to him. hes also the type of Latino dad that goes to church religiously and preaches the word of god but yet is so fucking closed.(nothing wrong with religion at all) I Just don’t know what I can do. If there’s anything I should do.
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