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tuffattack
12 39,825
L Advanced 8
5.0 star rating
Rating
Number of ratings15 Number of reviews13 Listens toTo Teens LanguagesEnglish, Filipino, Tagalog Listener sinceJul 13, 2023 Last activein last week GenderMale PathStep 38 People helped59 Chats311 Group support chats96 Listener group chats263 Forum posts50 Forum upvotes82
Bio



         I am currently on break for personal reasons (3/4/24). I am unsure when I will be 100% back on cups

Hi, I'm Tuff!



I am here for you to listen to what you need to talk about, whatever that might be :) Big or small, or just a fun chat. I am proud of you for reaching out for help. 

My Amazing listener twin is @Violetnotes 




My Previous Roles




✔️ Listener Chatroom Supporter 




✔️ Anonymous Evaluations Team




✔️ Listener Verifier




✔️ Verified Listener




✔️ Peer Support




My Status Meaning




 💚 Green - I am online, and you can message me! 💚




🧡 Orange - I am currently busy, and I am not accepting any new requests 🧡




❤️ Red - I am offline, however you can message me! I will respond within 24 hours ❤️




Experience




I have struggled with my own mental health problems through out my life. This include depression, anxiety, personality disorders, substance issues, eating disorders, etc. For most of the chats I accept, I may know a little bit more than you might think (:




In my life time, I have also been in mental health treatment, which includes a residential treatment center for 9 1/2 months. I am pretty open about my time in treatment, so feel free to ask any questions you might have.




Chats I do not take




For personal reasons, I do not take LGBTQ+, dating/relationship issues, and sexual health related chats. Thank you for understanding







About Me




I’m a pole vaulter and I’m currently vaulting 12 feet!




I’m obsessed with the pbs kids show, Arthur. It’s been my biggest interest since I was a little kid




My dream job is forensic psychology. 




I really enjoy art and poetry. Currently I mainly do water color and free verse poetry. 


My personality typing is

INFJ IN(F) IEI 5w4 469 so/sp EVLF /R/[L]oai melancholic [dominant]




Quotes




"Destiny is a gift. Some go their entire lives, living existences of quiet desperation, never learning  the truth that what feels as though a burden pushing down upon their shoulders is really a sense of purpose that lifts us the greater heights. Never forget that fear is but the precursor to valor, that to strive and triumph in the face of fear is what it means to be a hero. Don't think. Become."




“What which we manifest is before us: we are the creators of our own destiny. Be it through intention or ignorance, our success and our failures have been used brought upon us by none other than ourselves”




You deserve to be listened to and heard 





-Tuff



#HopeForHappyfeet Thank you for being in my life 


























Recent forum posts
Boundaries, Burnout, and Everything In Between
Newbie Hub / by tuffattack
Last post
 September 15th, 2023
...See more @VioletNotes and I have been working on this post for a few weeks for now (: And we are excited to share it with all of you. I hope you all enjoy and maybe find this helpful! _____________________________________________________________________________________________ Let’s play an imagination game! *Close your eyes and imagine sitting on your phone/computer. It was an alright day and you’re in the mood to want to do something bigger. You find an amazing website called 7 Cups! Wow! I can help people and it gets me excited. It feels amazing; someone saying that the conversation helped! I feel happy and excited.* Many of us know that feeling. 7 Cups brings us joy and happiness when we help someone and make their day a little bit better. It can definitely be thrilling. And at the same time, destroy us mentally. New listeners on 7 Cups are most likely to experience burnout. Listening can become addictive and some listeners get 50-100 chats in one day! And slowly but surely, the joy we once had becomes a chore. So today, let’s talk about burnout and boundaries as newbies. So what is burnout? Burnout can be defined as exhaustion of emotional strength or motivation, as a result of prolonged stress or frustration. Similarly, compassion fatigue is a common risk for volunteers. Unlike burnout, though, it is caused by taking on the pain of others (members), and by caring too much. By doing this, you may become fatigued, and even withdraw emotionally. Now, you may be thinking, how can someone care too much? You’re right that caring is a great quality, and as a listener you are greatly appreciated for that! However, there can be too much of a good thing. Think back to how you’ve spent your first days on 7 cups. Maybe you took your first chat, and that went really well! Suddenly, though, you notice how many hurting people there are waiting in the general queue, so you take on a couple more chats. Maybe those go well too, but soon enough there are five more people waiting, and if you don’t help them, who will? Read more about pacing yourself here. Let’s look at some warning signs of burnout. At this point, you may be experiencing some uncomfortable and difficult emotions. Helping people is all that you want to do, but perhaps you start feeling emotionally exhausted, detached, or unaccomplished. When caring for so many people, it can be difficult to apply the same compassion that you once harbored for members. [emotional exhaustion; compassion fatigue] You might even find yourself thinking of members as tasks, and forgetting that they are real, often hurting, people. Dreading each “task,” or member, becomes your new reality. [detachment, depersonalization] Another warning sign that you may be experiencing burnout is a sense of demoralization. Feeling that you aren’t helping people, or that you aren’t making a difference is a common side effect of listening to so many members who are struggling. We cannot help everyone, and it is easy to forget that our main prerogative is simply to listen and be a supportive presence. It is possible to avoid all of this discomfort, and if you’ve yet to experience many of these symptoms, yay! I am relieved and happy for you. You’ve caught burnout early, and you can take every step necessary to make sure that it does not affect you to any greater extent. How? Setting boundaries and engaging in regular self-care is the best way to ensure that you are helping yourself to better help others. What is a boundary in relation to 7 cups? A boundary is a limit or line that you set. As a listener, this might be telling a member, “no.” Being able to take a step back from a constant influx of PMs is needed in order to make time for yourself and fully utilize self-care methods. Please take a deeper look at boundaries here [/?%20-%207%20Cups%20Forum] if you are continuing to feel the effects of burnout. Now, nobody said setting boundaries was easy… but here is what you can do if you are ever struggling: Reach out to a mentor. It is possible to go it alone, but talking it through with someone experienced can be an amazing thing too. To connect to a mentor, click here [https://tinyurl.com/ya9lju8z] So, here we are, experiencing some serious burnout and still juggling too many responsibilities. You aren’t alone! While it is common for new listeners to struggle with burnout, it can happen to anyone, even the most experienced listeners. Here’s the good news: there is a way out, and there’s a whole team of people here to help you. First, I would suggest rereading the section on boundaries. Though you may not have started out with strong boundaries, you can put them in place now to help yourself going forward. Now that we’ve dealt with that, you may still be feeling emotionally drained yourself. Self care is next on the agenda, one of the most important aspects of being a listener. Self care can be defined as, “the practice of taking an active role in protecting one's own well-being and happiness, in particular during periods of stress.” Note that this says particularly during periods of stress, not explicitly. Self care should be something that you practice consistently. How can you practice self care and implement it in your day-to-day life? First, we can start by listing some forms of self care. There is a broad range of ways to care for you, starting with basic needs and extending to emotional, practical needs. Read more about types of self care here One important thing to remember is that self care is not selfish. Focusing on you is sometimes the best way to move forward! Maintaining self care and continuing to practice it is what prevents burnout from coming back, so taking the time to recognize how valuable it is is essential. Read about a fellow newbie’s perspective on self care here. The main focus of this post is new listeners! So, what can you take away from this information? I would say that burnout is common, and you aren’t alone in experiencing it. However, we have lots of tools here on 7 cups to help you get back to your happy place, helping others and feeling fulfilled while taking care of you as well. Now it’s your turn! * What have your experiences been as a new listener relating to burnout, boundaries, and self care? * If you’re a seasoned listener, do you have any tips for newbies? * Lastly, comment what you learned! How might you implement all of this into your listener journey? *text in blue is clickable ------------------------- Tagging a few people who may enjoy this post @Tobedoctor @TabbyCat97 @SupportiveMitch @tommy @Amy @Frixndlyghost3708 @FrenchMarbles @Mahad2804 @DonaldDraper
No Cupsing Late at Night!
Hobby Zone / by tuffattack
Last post
 January 9th
...See more Similarly to “No cupsing in class”, I have noticed a lot of members and listeners staying up late at night to be on cups Definition: Cupsing at night: The act of being on Cups in pms, group chats, and/or forums at night. It is recommended to get about 8 hours of sleep a night (: Tag your favorite ATL, Teens, adults, or members who are up a little too late on cups Please write a 3-4 sentence paragraph explaining why you are awake and the importance of sleep 😴 @VioletNotes @SupportiveMitch @TabbyCat97 @tommy @amy @FrenchMarbles @Frixndlyghost370 @Mahad2804 @richuyulin
Search more from @tuffattack
Feedback & Reviews
Amazing listener, very understanding and easy to talk to💗💗
EXTREMELY GOOD!!! he’s so sweet
Wonderful listener, helped me through many tough times
So sweet I really really love talking to Tuff! He made me feel so welcome in my own skin when I was lost and cannot wait to talk again! Thanks Tuff
Amazing listener, really and truly helped me feel safe and listened to and like I could tell them what was on my mind and not feel judged. They weren't too serious but not too loose either, so they just felt like a close pal or someone you trust, really comforting. Thanks again!
awesome very good
Super kind and helpful
Very intuitive and truly does listen, and empathizes.
good to talk to
Understanding and listens well despite delayed replies from me
Long story short an amazing listener, relates to many things and understood everything in the best way possible and really helpful and fun:)
they are helping me understand and accept some things
He was really helpful and made me feel better about me and I would definitely recommend him.
Categories
Depression
Managing Emotions
Bullying
Eating Disorder
Panic Attacks
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ADHD
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Borderline (BPD)
Self-Esteem
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Autism Spectrum
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Adoption/Foster Care
Personality Disorder
Badges & Awards
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