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willingSugar9815
1 3,593 M Seeking Light 2
PathStep 72 Compassion hearts290 Forum posts105 Forum upvotes143 Current upvotes143 Age GroupAdult Last activeOctober, 2024 Member sinceSeptember 23, 2022
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Hate that I have no reason to struggle
Self-Harm Recovery / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 October 14th, 2024
...See more Struggling not to relapse again, I feel like I can't tho as I have no reason to struggle 
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Read with caution ig
Eating Disorder Support / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 October 20th, 2023
...See more I hate feeling this way, I hate my body, I hate feelings, I hate me, I hate life, I just want a break from it all. It’s a cycle of purging, shing, gaining hope, said hope getting destroyed and i’m honestly starting to lose hope on getting clean, i don’t really see the point Nearly everyday this week i’ve purged something and started self harming again the last 2 days and i’ve tried to stop but it’s to much, I even been video calling a friend who knows about the sh and we video called meaning everyday this week either to talk or i needed a distraction as i fell *** or the other day it was because I was seriously considering selfharming and needed something to keep me accountable. I hate this, the fact i feel myself slipping back into my old ways the lack of emotion and care, the feeling of slipping back into my head, not being in control and i know it will only get worse on monday when I go back to school. It’s so much easier to skip meals, purge, sh and i always force myself to get 10 000 steeps a day and i have a dr appointment this month where i get weighed and every time i’ve had that it’s just made everything worse and I know the closer that day comes the worst it’s going to get.
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Guess we did it again
Self-Harm Recovery / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 October 4th, 2023
...See more 152 days down the drain, today i sh 3 times in 2 different forms. why do I always do this I give myself hope then take it away from myself. I don’t think i’m going to bother stopping if I really want to sh I might as well do it, and I can use forms that don’t leave scars. Safe: With family
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Im sorry
Eating Disorder Support / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 September 27th, 2023
...See more I feel like crap, just purged and have a feeling im probably going to do it again. I have been fighting the urges for almost 4 hours. I also have to eat lunch (my mum made it for me last night when she was mking hers for work) and my parents especially my mum wants me to go on the tredmill which I then use it in a harmful way because my thoughts are killing me on rhe inside. Sorry, pretty sure no one even bothered reading rhis anyways. I just want it to stop, all i want to do is purge right now even though i havent reallh eaten anything. Im not sure if im meant to say im safe or not but if so, safe i guess, might do my jobs (unfortunatly inclueds tredmill) then write.
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Advice needed
Eating Disorder Support / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 September 27th, 2023
...See more Anyone have any advice on handling purging. I’m honestly struggling with not walking off and doing it. So, please anything will be welcomed and appreciated.
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Words of support would be appreciated
Eating Disorder Support / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 September 26th, 2023
...See more I'm so close to crying right now, the urge to purge is *** strong. Words of support and motivation would be appreciated.
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Help
Anxiety Support / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 September 25th, 2023
...See more I don’t know what to do my heart feels like it’s racing, i can’t slow my breathing and i’m overwhelmed, god i’m going crazy. Anyone. have an idea in what to do? Dont worry, i can handles it, i think lol, sorry barely thinking
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Need some advice *may be triggering i’m not sure
Anxiety Support / by willingSugar9815
Last post
 September 27th, 2023
...See more I don’t know what’s been happening i’ve been getting frequently overwhelmed where my heart races, i struggle to speak or move, it feel slightly restricted to breathe and i feel like everyone’s staring. I will also feel numb, my body will go between being cold to warm, my stomach will ache making me feel sick, ect. Does anyone may have an ideas on why i feel this way or anything that may help it not get so bad as it’s getting really bad a school where i honestly will just sit there staring into space just trying to remember to hide it and make sure i’m at least giving basic response to my friends so they don’t realise that i’m trying to remember and even my breathing and stop the sick feeling. Hope i’m not bothering anyone
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